


after the war

by ivyxwrites



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 (Naruto)-centric, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 as Family (Naruto), Domestic Fluff, Gen, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Hokage Hatake Kakashi, Hyuuga Neji Lives, Kakashi is sort of an unreliable narrator, M/M, Mokuton User Haruno Sakura, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Post-Third Shinobi War, Protective Hatake Kakashi, Protective Yamato | Tenzou, Shinobi Politics (Naruto), at least my attempt at shinobi politics, it's about the found family
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:02:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29321355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ivyxwrites/pseuds/ivyxwrites
Summary: After the war, Konoha slowly learns to heal the wounds left behind. For Hatake Kakashi and his team, healing is a complicated path they all must learn to walk together. As he experiences his new position as Hokage in the village, Kakashi becomes accutely aware that everyone on his team is working through their own personal demons--including himself. Determined, he sets off on a journey to fix everything the shinobi world left broken--except himself.orFive times Kakashi knew exactly what to do for his former Team 7 and the one time they knew exactly what to do for him.
Relationships: Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Haruno Sakura, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Hatake Kakashi, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Sai, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Uchiha Sasuke, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Uzumaki Naruto, Dai-nana-han | Team 7 & Yamato | Tenzou, Hatake Kakashi/Yamato | Tenzou
Comments: 52
Kudos: 134





	1. tenzo

**Author's Note:**

> I've had this series hidden in my drive for over a month or two, but today I thought I should start letting it go. Half of it is already written, and I'm hoping the other half will come to me once I've let go of the first half. 
> 
> I'm pretty proud of a lot of the content in the first three chapters, and I hope you all enjoy at least half as much of what I enjoyed while I wrote it. Team 7 as a family is one of my favorite tropes. I just think they deserve happiness, to be honest, so here's my attempt at what I think could've/should've happened after the war. This is probably set a little less than a year after the war, and Sasuke is already out but hasn't gone on his trip. My reason for that is that I want Sasuke to bond with Sai and Yamato at all costs. 
> 
> Like my tags say, Kakashi is a little bit of an unreliable narrator, so even if he sees a lot of things happening, there are some questions that he has not answered himself and, therefor, you guys can't know them either. If I ever make a longer series out of this, then you'll get to see some questions answered haha
> 
> Additionally, this IS a Mokuton User Sakura fic. I'll explain that at the notes at the end. 
> 
> Hope you enjoy it!!

Kakashi makes it very clear that he doesn’t want the Hokage mansion. Hell, he hadn’t even wanted the title, but he hadn’t had much choice in the matter. He realized Tsunade needed to retire for the rest of her life, and Naruto wasn’t yet quite old enough to take her place just right out of the war. The Copy-Nin had accepted the title of Rokudaime because it was his duty, but he thought the house was a bit too much. 

  
  


It was plagued with ghosts of his past and the pasts of others. Kakashi didn’t need that kind of bad karma in his life anymore.

  
  


So, he’d said no to the Hokage mansion. The council still begged him to find better living arrangements that weren’t anywhere near the standard-issue jonin apartments that had been recently rebuilt and that had been his home ever since the Sandaime had kicked him out of ANBU up until the war broke out. Sakura and Sai, little meddlesome students that they were, assigned themselves to the desperate case that was finding him a home that satisfied both his need for comfort and the council’s need for harassing him all the time. 

  
  


Sakura had amassed a lengthy compilation of the residential areas of Konoha, both present and future. Konoha was still undergoing heavy rebuilding efforts, so most of the pamphlets that his former student brought to his office on Thursdays (their designated meeting day) had been of empty lots that were going to be turned into homes in the near future. Sai, on the other hand, had made it his mission to take all of Sakura’s informational guides and point out all the pros and cons to each, scribbling down his notes around the margins so Kakashi could read through them later when he was alone. It was overwhelming at times, but he was glad his students were looking out for him. 

  
  


Like everything his team did, however, it ran out of their hands. 

  
  


Sakura liked researching. It came to her as easy as breathing after so many years cooped up in the library while growing up, so she always had new information to give him at any given time. It absolutely did not help that Sai liked to debunk some of her favorite options by pointing out how inconvenient they were for Kakashi’s needs, only to have the remaining options be absolutely trashed by the Rokudaime himself.

  
  


In his defense, he wasn’t being purposefully difficult. Sakura and Sai were doing good by him, but none of the places they’ve shown him (built or soon-to-be-built) had felt right. He knew he had no right to be choosy, especially since the council was running all of them ragged because they couldn’t have the supreme leader of the village living in the standard-issued apartment complexes that Kakashi liked just fine. 

  
  


“Sage almighty, sensei!” Sakura whines, letting her head loll back on the couch she had commandeered in Naruto’s new apartment at the end of their weekly team dinner, “Just say yes to one already! I’m running out of options! At this rate, you’ll end up living at the edge of the village.” 

  
  


The thought sounded appealing to Kakashi, so he hummed his assent. He only hoped his feelings came across. 

  
  


“I have to agree with Sakura, sensei,” Sai backed her up, a small crease adorning his brow while he was pouring another one of Sakura’s leaflets, “We’re grasping at straws. Most of these latest options are less than ideal for the Rokudaime of Konoha.” 

  
  


Kakashi only awards him with a grunt. Sakura throws a pillow at his face for his troubles. If it hits his head with much less force than he is used to from Sakura, he doesn’t mention it in the slightest. He  _ does  _ return the favor to her, however, earning him a hilarious squeak of indignation and the threat of never again buying him lunch. 

  
  


“Why don’t you just pick one, Kakashi-sensei?” Naruto asks, his head in Sakura’s lap as he reaches over for one of the many pamphlets covering his coffee table, “This one looks nice! What’s wrong with this one?” 

  
  


Sai picks up his head from where he was reviewing another guide, squinting at the piece of paper Naruto is holding in his hand with a small frown on his face, “Well, I jotted that one down as one of the possibles, but Kakashi-sensei doesn’t like heavily populated areas so he said no to that one and like three others after it.” 

  
  


Naruto hums, tossing the paper in his hand to the floor and reaching for another one, “What about this one?” 

  
  


“Sai insists that shinobi quartiers six and seven are  _ inadequate _ ,” Sakura answers, a clear frown on her face, “I think they’re perfectly fine. They have easy access to the market and that particular development is furthest from the heavily populated areas Kakashi-sensei hates. I find quartier seven really charming at night.” 

  
  


“Yes, but they’re also the first-generation quartiers,” Sai points out, his voice strained, like he’s given this argument a thousand times (spoiler: he has), “The  _ council  _ finds them inadequate, Sakura.” 

  
  


“Screw the council,” Sakura mumbles, one of her hands coming to tangle in Naruto’s hair just as the boy tosses the leaflet and grabs another one. Without missing a beat, the kunoichi answers the unasked question, “Kakashi says he doesn’t like district two because the Yamanaka compound takes up a lot of space and their greenhouses give him allergies.” 

  
  


“Valid,” Naruto answers, tossing that one too and picking one from the bottom, as if that will change the answer, “What about this one? District four is a little further from Hokage tower, but still within walking distance. Plus, it has its own marketplace--maybe not as good as the one closest to the merchant circle but I can vouch for it.” 

  
  


“It’s crowded  _ and  _ Kakashi-sensei wants enough patio for his ninken to run around,” Sai answers next, his expression somewhere between stoic and long-suffering, “His previous living accomodations suggest otherwise, but he won’t listen to reason.” 

  
  


“You can both quit this job, you know?” Kakashi says, thoroughly amused, “It’s not like I’m paying you.” 

  
  


Sakura looks appalled by this, “And miss out on the chance to hound you over wall decor? My one goal in life is to sneak in as much plant imagery into your home as I can get away with, and step one is helping you find a house.” 

  
  


Kakashi turns his head towards Sai then, “What’s  _ your  _ evil, ulterior motive?” 

  
  


“I don’t think it’s evil,” Sai muses, leaning back on his hands, finally giving up on his task, “I just want to make sure Yamato-taicho has a good bed to come back home to.” 

  
  


There’s a beat of silence. Kakashi doesn’t drop Sai’s look for even a second, and although the junior ANBU seems to be processing why what he said might’ve been inappropriate (a healthy tool his therapist insists he make use of), he doesn’t avert his eyes either. From the corner of his eye, Kakashi watches as Sakura and Naruto stare at each other with twin, gleeful faces. 

  
  


“And here I thought we were being stealthy.” 

  
  


The silence is suddenly cut by Tenzo’s steady baritone, which startles Naruto and Sakura badly enough that they end up bumping foreheads as they try to stand up from their couch. Kakashi’s concerned for their situational awareness, and sticks a mental note to his brain about testing them on that soon. He hadn’t noticed the ANBU Commander (or Sasuke) come in either, signatures hidden after a long mission away from Konoha, but he had, at least, recognized his partner’s voice as soon as he spoke. 

  
  


“Should I be concerned about your apparently subpar sensing abilities?” Yamato jokes, leaning over the couch, hands on either side of Sakura’s shoulders where she’s finally settled, rubbing the sore spot between her eyes, “Naruto, I thought we had honed your sensing abilities out of sage mode already.” 

  
  


“In my defense,” Sakura starts, looking up at her captain with a grimace, “I had a 36-hour shift before dinner. Also, you’re still suppressing.” 

  
  


Yamato, ever the loving father of this partnership, laughs heartily and leans down to kiss the diamond on Sakura’s forehead, “You should sleep more, Sakura.” 

  
  


“Says the man coming back from a week-long mission,” Naruto grumbles, settling back down on Sakura’s lap, “Aye, bastard, Sai made onigiri with okaka. We made bentos for you and Yamato-taicho, so be sure to take them home.” 

  
  


Sasuke grunts his assent from his position by the window, and Kakashi wishes sometimes his student hadn’t learned all the socially awkward things from him. He only hoped Tenzo’s good natured spirit would rub off on Sasuke eventually after all these missions together. 

  
  


“How were reparations in Kumo?” Kakashi asks, just as Tenzo rounds the corner of the couch to plop down on the arm of it, “Ran into any trouble on the way?” 

  
  


“Not at all. Mission went smoothly,” Yamato smiles good-naturedly at him, his hair still dripping from the shower he must’ve taken before coming here, “Sasuke made some friends.” 

  
  


“Did you make use of the books I lent you before you left?” Sai asks Sasuke, eyes bright and hopeful, “They certainly didn’t help me with Naruto and Sakura, but maybe you have better common sense than I do.” 

  
  


Kakashi won’t be the one to tell Sai that Sasuke is just as bad at human interaction as he was once upon a time. He thinks Sai’s efforts to resocialize Sasuke back into village life are honorable, not to mention adorable, but they’re mostly pointless. The last Uchiha seems to not want to crush Sai’s enthusiasm either, so he simply nods once in assent. 

  
  


“The books were,” Sasuke begins, and stops to find the right word, “ _ sufficient _ .” 

  
  


Sakura tries to hide a smile by turning to look down at Naruto, who simply pokes her ribs playfully to help her play dumb. Kakashi and Yamato both act like they didn’t see it. 

  
  


“I’m glad,” Sai smiles, a gesture he’s gotten the hang of pretty recently thanks to continued exposure to a certain Yamanaka heiress who he helps on weekends at the flower shop, “Please, don’t worry about giving them back. If you found them to be good material, I’d be happy to lend you some more.” 

  
  


Sasuke looks about ready to die, so Yamato interjects before the conversation can crash and burn, “So, what were you guys talking about earlier?” 

  
  


Sakura takes the hook quickly, leaning against Tenzo’s side, “Kakashi-sensei won’t choose a house and Sai is worried you might have to come back to his dingy, little apartment for the rest of your life.” 

  
  


“It’s a practical apartment,” Kakashi sighs, “Gai makes do with it. Kurenai makes do with it. We all make do with the standard jonin apartments. I don’t know why the council insists I have to move.” 

  
  


“Gai-sensei and Kurenai-sensei have been living in the new housing sector in district five for the past  _ ten months _ ,” Sakura shoots back, “I literally helped set Mirai’s room with Shikamaru in September and helped organize Gai’s housewarming party with Tenten. You were there, sensei.” 

  
  


“Was I?” 

  
  


Sakura makes a sound between a whine and a sigh, burying her face in Yamato’s black shirt as her former captain presses a hand to the side of her head with a small chuckle. 

  
  


“I think you all have had enough of Kakashi’s living dilemma,” Tenzo announces, “What’s on today’s recreational schedule?” 

  
  


Naruto shoots up from his place with renewed energy, shooting off from the couch to his room in the back of his apartment with a loud cackle. Sakura knows a chance when she sees one, so she scoots over to give Yamato some room and then slots herself between his arm and shoulder with no reservations. The Mokuton user laughs, adjusting their position until they’re both comfortable, and kissing the top of her head because he knows she appreciates physical forms of affection despite them not being his forte. Kakashi growls jokingly at Sakura when the kunoichi looks at him dead in the eye and sticks her tongue out at him. He promises retaliation when she least expects it. 

  
  


Naruto comes back with a board game. Sasuke tries to jump out the window to avoid this particular recreational activity, but is stopped by the potted plants out in Naruto’s balcony as they grow to create a barrier with the outside. The last Uchiha turns on his heels and shoots equally unamused looks at both Yamato and Sakura. The two possible culprits don’t meet his eyes, turning to each other with bright grins on their faces. 

  
  


When Naruto finally gets Sasuke to sit down in the living room to play with them, Sakura is already asleep in the safety of Tenzo’s arms. Kakashi watches what is left of his team while they work through the instruction manual and try to make sense of the rules of the game. He already knows they won’t make good on their promise to their captain to not wake Sakura up, as Sai is always overly competitive and Sasuke can’t help but match his spirits, which pulls Naruto into the mix as well. Kakashi couldn’t care less about winning or losing, and the boys always found it worthy of indignation that he half-assed his way through the boards and still managed to be decent at it. Yamato usually served as a buffer between all of their explosive behaviors, but since he was currently busy being Sakura’s pillow, Kakashi was sure he wouldn’t be taking part in the festivities tonight. 

  
  


So, Kakashi enjoys the little moments while they last. He appreciates Sai’s quips that drive Sasuke up a wall, and Naruto’s aborted whoops everytime he wins something but remembers Sakura is still asleep. Sasuke doesn’t comment much, but his extreme concentration over a board game is a welcomed sight in comparison to his overly rigid self nonetheless. Like this, he looks more like the twelve year old that was once put under his supervision, and Kakashi’s heart aches in his chest with the memory of yesterday. 

  
  


But then, he takes one long look at Sakura pressed against Tenzo’s side, and he looks at Sai’s smiling face as Sasuke has to pay more of his bright colored bills for yet another in-game infraction. The scene is homely, familiar, and while Kakashi had lost his family very early on, he reckons this is what it felt like being around his father on the better days. His family wouldn’t be complete without Yamato by his side, and without Sai learning to be a real boy with the help of Sakura and Naruto. 

  
  


None of the kids he’d passed as Team 7 were the same anymore, either. Sasuke, perhaps the most changed of the bunch, was still finding his way towards light again, trying to redeem himself from his sins of the past. Naruto was more mature, and yet Kakashi was thankful that he kept some of his innocence even through all the tragedy he’d fallen prey to. Sakura, the only heir to the legacy that was Senju Tsunade, a civilian girl he hadn’t given a second thought to back when she was still twelve and held the stars in her eyes, but she proved him and everyone else wrong by becoming exactly who she was always meant to be. The path that destiny had woven for them all had been cruel and full of hardship, but they all came out better by the end of it. 

  
  


Kakashi came out better by the end of it. He had his family with him. 

  
  


A thought crosses his mind, and then, suddenly, shinobi district one didn’t sound as unappealing as it had at the beginning of this week. 

  
  


// 

Sakura and Sai won’t let up on their mission, so when Kakashi let’s them know he might’ve found a place he’s interested in moving into, they’re the first ones to volunteer to go canvas the area with him. Yamato tags along because it's Cat’s turn to guard the Hokage, but he doesn’t wear his ANBU uniform and Kakashi appreciates that. 

  
  


The land where the Hatake compound had once stood is still guarded by the ancient wards, placed there upon the settling of the clan in Konoha’s early days. He’d received notification of it when the first reconstruction efforts started, but had decided not to do anything before his mind could clear up a bit after the war. There had been no time afterwards, when Tsunade had passed the mantle onto him and his responsibilities had doubled overnight. Now seemed like a good time as any. 

  
  


There were no traces of the compound, of course. Konoha had had enough invasions and had just come out of a war--no other compound had survived and his had been no exception. He hadn’t come back to it for decades, but he could still imagine the gardens and rows of houses neatly organized inside this piece of land that had been the Hatake’s for a long time. 

  
  


Kakashi hadn’t wanted the Hokage mansion, with its ghosts and its bad karma, but these were ghosts that needed to be taken care of. Kakashi’s life had been shaken until nothing was left, and if he could salvage something from the past that he could revindicate, then he couldn’t think of anything better than the Hatake compound. He had a new family, and while the loss of his own would never disappear from his heart, moving on didn’t sound as frightening as it had once upon a time. 

  
  


“I thought you didn’t want to come back here,” Tenzo is the first one to break the silence stretching among the members of former Team 7, as Sakura and Sai wander away together, “Are you okay with rebuilding here? I know you had been postponing the request the civil engineering team sent you months ago.” 

  
  


Kakashi takes in a deep breath, grey eyes following pink and black hair as his students move away from where he and his partner still stand. Now that they’re further away from Kakashi, he notices them talking, whispers shared between each other as they start imagining what they could do with so much space. He pictures for a second what the Hatake symbol would look like between their shoulder blades and discards the thought as quickly as it came. 

  
  


“I guess I’m ready to let go of the past,” Kakashi answers Tenzo, turning to grab his hand and twine their fingers together like the ANBU Commander wasn’t on duty and he wasn’t the Hokage, “And move into the future.” 

  
  


Yamato smiles at him, fingers squeezing his in the space between their bodies, “What made you change your mind?” 

  
  


Grey eyes find Sakura and Sai again. Sakura’s hair is getting longer, brushing past her shoulders to graze the edge of the Haruno merchant circle on her back. Sai is taller now, and he’s begun wearing brighter colors around the village. His kids are growing up. His kids, who were never afraid of tomorrow, even when they had lost and struggled. They had ushered in an era of peace together--a future forged by their bonds and their hard work.

  
  


“They have their ways to make an old man change his mind,” he says. “It’s hard not to think about the future when they’re growing up so fast.” 

  
  


Yamato hums in assent, “It’s certainly difficult to ignore. We have good students.” 

  
  


Kakashi thinks Tenzo might have wanted to say something different. He knows what it is even if his partner won’t say it. 

  
  


“Yeah,” he answers, “we do.” 

  
  


The rest of the evening is spent trying to figure out what to do with the extra space of the Hatake compound. Kakashi chooses to limit the main house to a smaller portion of the land, and with the help of his students, manages to adjust the wards’ restrictions to refit around the smaller section. He asks Sakura and Yamato to create the foundation for a house, using a stick to draw the general shape in the loose soil at his feet, but doesn’t ask them to build anything other than that. In seconds, there are pillars and floor boards that mark the general outline of a home, but no walls and no details to bring it all together.

  
  


“Kakashi-sensei,” Sakura asks, as she sits on the wooden deck they’ve just created and takes a bottle of water Sai hands her thankfully, “I don’t mean to be nosy, but are you planning on asking the construction crew to come help with the rest of the house?” 

  
  


He doesn’t mention that she’s his most meddlesome student, even if she is. Instead, he goes to sit next to her, crossing his ankles in front of him as he leans backwards placing his hands behind him on the ground to stare at what will be his new home. 

  
  


“Maybe,” he says, “for now I just want to start building this myself. I’m just one man, so I might need help, but like I said ten months ago, I’m not going to exploit yours and Yamato’s talents. That would be selfish and unreasonable.” 

  
  


“I’d be happy to do it, though,” Sakura says, a small crease between her brows, “I can ask Shizune-senpai for a week off and we can come build little by little, if you’re worried about chakra exhaustion. I can take care of myself.” 

  
  


He chuckles and ruffles her hair, “I know that you can, pup,” he tells her, “I guess it’s more of a symbolic thing. You’re welcome to come help me whenever you want, but we’re doing this the hard way, yeah?” 

  
  


She looks conflicted about it, but realizes she won’t be winning the battle, so she nods and shuffles until she’s pressed to his side, “Alright. How will you manage Hokage duties and construction, though?” 

  
  


“I’ll think of something,” Kakashi says, “Don’t worry too much about it. I’ll let you know when I begin so you can come if it makes you happy.” 

  
  


“It would make me happy to participate, as well, Kakashi-sensei,” Sai pipes up, coming to sit on his other side, “I may only excel at drawing, but I’m sure I can be of some assistance.” 

  
  


“Of course, Sai, you’re welcome to come help as well.” 

  
  


“Are you sure you don’t want me to use the Mokuton for this?” Yamato insists, still standing by one of the pillars he and Sakura had created for the foundation, “It seems like a difficult project to undertake manually.” 

  
  


“Well, the village is being reconstructed at a steady pace,” Kakashi says, “If I didn’t allow both of you to help with anything that wasn’t essential in the village, then I will not ask for you to help with my home. What would the people think?” 

  
  


“That would easily be solved if you let us help the village,” Sakura pokes his ribs playfully, “Then Konoha would be restored in about a week and you could move into your house tomorrow.” 

  
  


He shakes his head, looking at Tenzo and hoping his eyes convey how important building his own home was to him more than his words, “This is something the village, and I, must do on our own.” 

  
  


// 

  
  


Kakashi knows Sakura and Yamato were helping restore smaller residential areas in their free time. They think they’re sneaky about it, but he’s the Hokage, and they’re his precious people, so he knows all of their tells when they’re hiding something from him. He’s known it since his term as Rokudaime started, but has thought it unnecessary to say anything since they still left room for the civil engineering team to do their job. He had pulled them from the reconstruction efforts very early on because Tenzo kept getting sick after using his Mokuton for large quantities of time, and Sakura was becoming exhausted during her hospital shifts. Both maladies had been rooted in something different, he knew, but if he could help them take better care of themselves, then he’d do it even if it was a small effort. 

  
  


Still, he knew he couldn’t avoid their involvement. He’d never been able to control Sakura in any way, shape, or form, and Tenzo was just as bullheaded if not more so than their kunoichi student was. It made him happy to know that Yamato seemed more comfortable with his Mokuton nowadays, and was proud of Sakura for catching up with what she had cheerfully dubbed the fake Mokuton, but he still worried about them. 

  
  


Which is why he kept a close eye on them while they worked on the reconstruction of the Hatake main house. They thought he wouldn’t notice, but he knew they were replenishing their wood whenever their supply started thinning, and he knew they were using their respective jutsus to do some smaller, cumbersome jobs to speed up the work.

  
  


Nevertheless, the house was coming along nicely. Naruto and Sasuke had come in to help as well, in the times that they could, and although they spent most of the time bickering with each other (or with Sakura and Sai, respectively) their help was still very much appreciated. Some of the newly dubbed Konoha 13 had come around to lend their expertise on different topics, often bringing food and beverages, but they never stayed more than a couple of hours. They recognized this team effort, whatever it was, was for Team 7 and Team 7 only. 

  
  


“Your lease is almost up, right?” Kakashi asks Tenzo during one of the construction days, when the kids have taken over the building materials and tools, forcing both their team leaders into break time. 

  
  


They’re sitting in the shade under one of the newer trees, those that Yamato and Sakura insisted they needed to grow inside the compound. Kakashi knew most of them were the offspring of the older trees that had once stood in the compound, which his partner and student had nurtured enough to make them big and healthy. Some others were the older trees themselves, healed by Sakura’s hand and Yamato’s strength. They were lovely, and Kakashi appreciated the sight of them more than he could express with words. 

  
  


Yamato doesn’t turn to look at him, still making sure none of the kids were getting into too much trouble, but he answers, “Yeah, probably by the end of this month. I’ll have to talk to the landlord about resigning my lease.” 

  
  


“What if you didn’t?” Kakashi asks, without missing a beat, “The house is almost done, structurally speaking. There’s space for two--more than that, honestly.” 

  
  


This makes Tenzo turn to look at him, eyes wide, looking much younger than Kakashi ever remembers seeing him, “What?” 

  
  


“The house,” Kakashi repeats, almost nonchalant, but his insides are a mess and his heart is about to slam out of his chest, “I know you’ve been cheating with the building and so has Sakura, so it’ll be only a couple more days before it’s finally finished. We’d only have to work on the minor details, but it’ll be livable soon.” 

  
  


Yamato stares, eyes blinking owlishly at his former commander and current Hokage. After the war, when the rubble had settled, and Sakura and Sai had come back with Tenzo in their arms, Kakashi had forgotten all the inhibitions and limitations he had set for himself, the ones that had stopped him from ever telling his junior how he really felt about him. In the aftermath of the massacre that was the fourth war, Kakashi had finally admitted to himself that Tenzo was more important to him than he had let on all those years working with and without him. He had then enlisted Sakura’s help to find a way to tell the other man. 

  
  


To say the least, things hadn’t worked out the way either of them expected them to work out, but they’d eventually figured it out. 

  
  


Then, Kakashi had become the Hokage, and Yamato had been appointed ANBU Commander by Tsunade before she had stepped down officially, which meant that their relationship had to be kept under wraps for the sake of the village. Their team knew, that was true, and Kakashi was certain Gai and Kurenai had something to say about it as well, but the general public was none the wiser. Yamato hadn’t necessarily liked it that way, but he held a position of power in the village and his partner was the supreme leader of Konoha. He was rational enough to know it was for the best. 

  
  


Except living together had always been out of the question, because some things were just difficult to keep under wraps. It was true that Yamato often snuck into Kakashi’s apartment when he came back from missions or always remained closer than any other ANBU guard in the roster, but the public didn’t need to know about those things. Living together was admitting that they were in a relationship, and Tenzo hadn’t known Kakashi was ready for that kind of level of commitment. 

  
  


“Tenzo?” Kakashi calls, a crease in his brow, “Are you okay?” 

  
  


It snaps Yamato back to attention long enough for him to say, perhaps a little too loudly, “I would love to move in with you.” 

  
  


“ _ You--what _ ?!” 

  
  


Sakura catches Naruto by the back of his black t-shirt before the boy topples over and off the roof where they had been working since that morning. The blonde boy is stunned out of his mind, but still scrambles to get his feet under himself before he kills himself and Sakura in the process. Sai exchanges a look of confusion with Sasuke over the stained glass window they had been trying to finish installing by the front porch, but he’s only met with a stony face and an open mouth. 

  
  


“Is it so surprising to you that someone wants to live with me as a romantic partner?” Kakashi asks, holding a hand up to his heart like he’s wounded by Naruto’s disbelief.

  
  


“No!” Naruto answers, almost immediately, and then adds, “Well, actually, yeah, a li--” 

  
  


Sakura shuts him up with a hand over his mouth, and instead says, “Congratulations, Yamato-sensei! Does that mean I can crash on Kakashi-sensei's couch now?” 

  
  


Kakashi’s brows meet in the middle, “I’m sorry? Why is that your first conclusion?” 

  
  


Yamato laughs, cheeks dusted with a pink shade similar to Sakura’s hair, “She sleeps on my couch after long shifts, usually.” 

  
  


“And this is a transferable thing,” Sakura says, looking too proud of herself, “so, since Yamato-sensei is moving, then my naps are moving with him, too.” 

  
  


“No,” Kakashi says, an air of finality about his tone, “they are not. You have an apartment.” 

  
  


Sakura pouts. She looks ridiculous still up on the roof. 

  
  


“Don’t give me that look, pup,” Kakashi continues, “you’re not going to break into my home. I don’t care how cute you think you are.” 

  
  


Before Sakura can answer with a whine, Sasuke’s low voice breaks through the conversation, effectively cutting her short. 

  
  


“I’m sorry,” he says, “let me get this straight. Yamato and Kakashi are  _ dating _ ?” 

  
  


Sai breaks into a smile, probably pleased over having gotten a social cue faster than Sasuke had. Kakashi just thinks it’s ridiculous that Sasuke possesses what is considered to be the most dangerous dojutsu in existance and still managed to miss his ANBU captain and his old sensei being together. 

  
  


“Sasuke, they  _ kissed _ after the war,” Naruto says, like he can’t quite believe what Sasuke is asking, “Where the fuck were you then?” 

  
  


“In a tent. Missing an arm.” 

  
  


“No, I’m pretty sure they kissed in said tent,” Sakura continues, looking thoughtful for a second, “because my plan backfired and Kakashi ended up saying something stupid.” 

  
  


Yamato laughs again, “I thought it was romantic.” 

  
  


“You’d think a trashcan on fire was romantic if it was Kakashi lighting it up,” Sakura shoots back, matter of factly, “You’re not a reliable source.” 

  
  


As his team descends into chaos, Kakashi can’t seem to chase away the warm feeling that’s steadily growing in the middle of his chest. His team, as they have always been, and yet so different from what he ever thought they’d be, surrounding the home that was once and will be again thanks to them. He notices, with no small amount of pride, the more natural wooden formations on his doors and window sills, products of Sakura’s not-quite-Mokuton, in contrast with Yamato’s smoother details engraved into the door frame and the underside of roofs. The brightly colored windows depicting the happy events of Kakashi’s life that Sai had made for him, shining under the receding sunshine. Naruto’s bright smile and Sasuke’s still stunned expression while he tries to catch up. 

  
  


He leans back on the tree trunk and sighs. He’s home. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, first chapter for a multi-chapter that I hope to finish! Next up is Sakura's chapter, but before that, some fun facts for this sort of AU? 
> 
> -Sakura has the Mokuton or, you know, the fake/replica Mokuton. My idea for this is that the Mokuton IS considered a bloodline limit, but Sakura is an example of how it most possibly isn't. This is because, in my AU, there aren't as many scrolls of information about Mokuton, which has led people to have misconceptions about it. I probably will write this someday, but my headcanon is that Sakura pestered Yamato so much about teaching her the Mokuton after meeting him that he eventually said yes, without the knowledge that it would actually work. Sakura is smart, and has near-perfect chakra control. She read and researched everything she could and decided the Mokuton looked less like a bloodline limit and more like a really hard formula that only people with near-perfect chakra control could get. She had to convince not only Yamato, but also Tsunade to be able to start training.
> 
> -Because of this, Sakura's Mokuton is different to Yamato's. Less refined and more like natural wood, which is why that's a reference to it in this fic.
> 
> -Might also write Kakashi's confession and the kiss Sasuke completely chose to erase from his memory because I find it hilarious. Yamato and Kakashi acting like their relationship is secret to Team 7 when it really isn't is also my favorite trope. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!! Please leave a comment if you enjoyed!!


	2. sakura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi knows that Sakura hasn't needed him since she became Tsunade's apprentice. Even before that, he knows he failed her before he failed either Naruto or Sasuke. It won't stop him from trying to fix what's happening with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is probably my favorite thing I've written during quarantine so far. Sakura is such a special character for me, for various reasons, and getting to explore hers and Kakashi's relationship through fanfiction has certainly been one of the heights of reconnecting with this old fandom of mine. It was hard to finish this, but I think it was worth every struggle I faced while writing. I hope that you all enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing! 
> 
> Thank you to my wonderful beta Lyssa, as usual! And to my friends Espoiretreves and TotallyARealPerson who, despite my spotty answers through these hellish months, have found their way to "after the war" to share their thoughts. A big thanks, as well, to my new friend snickiebear, who commented last chapter how excited they were to see what was next. I hope I don't disappoint any of you! 
> 
> Enjoy!

Sometimes he forgets they’re not children anymore. 

  
  


It’s especially difficult with Sakura, who Kakashi had tried his best to shelter and protect from shinobi life when she was just a genin. Her civilian background had scared him the most out of his entire team, because it made her more fragile, more prone to trauma, and Kakashi had tried his best to always keep her from the fights. He knew she could punch the living daylights out of any man or woman (or goddess), but she still had bright green eyes that shone like jadeites and bubblegum pink hair that was impractical for missions. 

  
  


When he looked at her, back when she was still a genin, he often saw Rin. Now, despite only seeing her as Sakura, he couldn’t help but still be scared. She was the legacy of Senju Tsunade in all but name. A strong kunoichi (perhaps the strongest), who fought fiercely and healed just as passionately. She overworked herself, had become independent at age 14, and hadn’t needed him for the longest of times. 

  
  


So, the first night Kakashi opens the door to the main house at the restored Hatake compound to find Sakura, with bags under her eyes and smelling like death, he doesn’t think twice about letting her inside. She looks exhausted, and is barely responsive, but she still asks, in a small voice, if she could spend the night on their couch. 

  
  


“Of course you can, Sakura,” he answers, smiling under his mask, “do you want to take a shower?” 

  
  


“That’d be nice,” she mumbles back, “have you installed your home phone already? I forgot mine at my hospital locker room and I want to make a call.” 

  
  


Kakashi finds it odd that she’d forget something, but he still nods, “Sure, it’s over by the kitchen. You can use it, I’ll go look for some clothes that you can change into.” 

  
  


She stares at him for a long moment, green eyes glazed over, and then she answers, “Right. I forgot my spare clothes at the locker, too. Sorry, sensei.” 

  
  


He shrugs, “Don’t mention it. Go ahead.” 

  
  


Sakura walks past him, directly to the kitchen, and he stands there looking at her back while she presses the button to dial a number. Her voice is tinny as she speaks, “Hello, Kō-san, it’s Haruno Sakura--is Neji-san home?” 

  
  


Kakashi allows her a minute of privacy, turning on his heels towards the main room, where Tenzo sits on the bed, reading some gardening book he bought from the bookshop recently. Bull and Bisuke are at his side, receiving pets intermittently in between his reading. 

  
  


“Was that Sakura?” his partner asks, looking up from his book--Bisuke gets up almost immediately upon hearing the kunoichi’s name and jumps off the bed at Kakashi’s nod, “Is she okay?” 

  
  


“She seemed a little out of it,” Kakashi explains, a frown under his mask, “She’s calling Hyuuga Neji--I didn’t know they were close.” 

  
  


Yamato purses his lips, “I should call Shizune.” 

  
  


“How come?” Kakashi asks, moving towards his bottom drawers, where he knows Yamato had unpacked his older clothes, which would probably fit Sakura better. 

  
  


“Sakura almost lost Neji-san in the Fourth War, right?” his partner asks, rummaging through his nightstand to find his cellphone. “Shizune let me know some months ago that Sakura had really bad breakdowns when losing patients--probably a remnant of the war. I still don’t understand how the habit came to be, but she’ll call Neji-san for reassurance every once in a while. Maybe just to hear he’s still alive thanks to her.”

  
  


Kakashi hadn’t known that. He feels wrong while doing it, but he enhances his hearing a little bit and picks up Sakura’s sniffles coming from the kitchen. Her voice is thin, and it cracks towards the end, but she seems calmer than he’d expected her to be. He can’t quite hear whatever Neji is saying on the other side of the line, but whatever the Hyuuga jonin was telling her, was doing the job. Kakashi continues to rifle through his bottom drawer, dropping the hearing enhancement to allow his former student some privacy. Tenzo finally finds his phone and is on a call with Shizune in less than three seconds. 

  
  


“I understand,” Yamato says into his receiver, “Thank you for letting me know.” 

  
  


A pause. Kakashi watches from the corner of his eye as his partner rubs a hand over his face, taking in a long, drawn-out inhale, “Yeah, she’s here with us. I’ll talk to her once she’s had some sleep. I’ll make sure she doesn’t go back to the hospital tomorrow.” 

  
  


Tenzo hangs up just as Kakashi finds an old white t-shirt from his teenage years. He still doesn’t know where he managed to salvage all these old things from, but he’s thankful for them tonight. This shirt still has the Hatake symbol embroidered in the back, something he hasn’t had on his clothes for a very long time, and the thought he had the other day, of his kids wearing this symbol on their backs, snaps to the front of his brain again. He pulls a pair of his older jonin pants from the same drawer, and he stands up, trying to bury the idea under the more urgent situation of Sakura’s emotional state. 

  
  


“She lost someone on the surgery table today,” Yamato tells him, voice low so their guest doesn’t hear them, “A chunin. He’d been in the hospital since the war ended. His situation worsened three days ago, so she’s been taking constant shifts since then. She probably hasn’t slept all that well.” 

  
  


Kakashi could relate to some level. Sakura was a medic, she had the lives of people in her hands on a daily basis. After the war, she had been among the few who took constant workloads, in and out of the hospital. Kakashi had to watch her work herself into the ground, much like he had once done back in ANBU, when he had first become part of the black-ops. He understood where she was coming from, but that destructive nature had been the reason why he had pulled her from reconstruction efforts. It was interesting, given where all of Team 7 had started, but Sakura somehow reminded him too much of himself. Her obsession with perfection and how she’d keep busy to avoid thinking about her issues--that was some textbook Kakashi behavior, and it scared him even more to know she might’ve learned to compartmentalize like this from him. 

  
  


“Yeah,” Sakura’s voice is soft, but less shaky now, as Kakashi steps into the hallway, “It’s your turn to convince Shikamaru to come out for drinks, though,” she laughs lightly, sniffles ones, and smiles a broken smile Kakashi’s way when he finds her by the kitchen, “I’ll check in tomorrow, promise. I have to go now. Thanks for picking up the phone, Neji-san.” 

  
  


The girl hangs up the phone, taking in a deep breath before turning towards Kakashi. Her eyes are red rimmed now, and there are definite tear tracks down her cheeks, but he makes sure not to look at her too pointedly. He extends his clothes to her, and Sakura takes them with a small thanks. 

  
  


“There are some towels in the guest room,” he explains, “and a strawberry scented shampoo in the bathroom.” 

  
  


“Pakkun’s?” she jokes, smiling. 

  
  


“Nothing but the best for my precious student,” he shoots back, and side steps so she can walk towards the guest room, “It’s my turn to make dinner--any special requests?” 

  
  


Sakura seems to consider this for a moment, pressing a slender finger to her chin, “Do you remember once, when we were genin, that you brought packed lunches for all of us?” 

  
  


“I did that several times, Sakura,” Kakashi laughs, “You children were bad at packing your own lunches.” 

  
  


“Well, yeah,” Sakura bites her bottom lip, looking kind of unsure now, “but there was this one time. You brought this thermos with a really sweet drink. It was the first time you ever shared anything sweet with us--I really liked it, but you never made it again.” 

  
  


“It was the day after your birthday,” Kakashi remembers, “I made that drink for you. Because you like sweet things and that was the only thing I could make without fucking it up.” 

  
  


The admission seems to take her aback, but a smile takes over her lips little by little. Soon, bright green eyes are beaming up at him. It makes his chest constrict, but it’s not painful, unlike so many memories he has nowadays. Mostly, he’d been a terrible teacher to Sakura, something he was still trying to make up for recently, but seeing her happy about something he did reminded him he could be better for her. 

  
  


“I can make it,” he says, resolutely, “don’t worry about it. I got it.” 

  
  


She looks like she wants to move towards him again, but doesn’t, “I was going to hug you,” she admits, “but I smell like a hospital and not the nice part of the hospital. I’ll take my shower, and then I’ll get my hug.” 

  
  


Kakashi smiles at her, “You could give me a hug now, I don’t mind.” 

  
  


She thinks about it for a second, and then she shakes her head, “No, that’s alright,” she says, “I don’t want you smelling like hospital--Kiba whines enough about it that I’ve learned my lesson.” 

  
  


“Alright,” he answers, “Guest room is in the back, the bathroom is in there as well. You’re welcome to leave your clothes in the laundry hamper. Yamato and I can take care of that.” 

  
  


“Such gentlemen,” Sakura mocks, in better spirits, as her feet pad towards the backroom, “I’ll be out in a second.” 

  
  


He tells her to take her time. As soon as she’s out of sight, he shunshins to the marketplace between districts seven and eight, where he knows he’ll find Sakura’s favorite tea supplier still open. All those years ago, Kakashi had bastardized an old family tea recipe, adjusting it with a blend of watermelon water and enough sugar to make him want to gag. Usually, he wouldn’t condone Sakura’s sweet tooth, especially when she was younger and prone to hyperactivity, but she was eighteen now, and Kakashi had a soft spot for her droopy, after-crying eyes. 

  
  


The tea vendor tries to give him the dried tea leaves and berries for free, but he sneaks in his payment without the woman noticing. Kakashi doesn’t like cheating the merchants out of their hard earned work, but ever since he became Hokage, people insisted on trying to give him things for free. It unnerved him because he earned a pretty good salary, all things considered, and had enough money to take care of himself and his partner. He knew people did it because they respected him, but it didn’t make it better. 

  
  


Sakura’s parents did it often, too, except he’d never managed to pay them back in any way. For civilians, Haruno Kizashi and Mebuki were pretty sneaky with their gifts. Usually, Kakashi would come home to find a new piece of furniture out by his front porch or a basket with an assortment of homemade jams and breads delivered to his office at the Hokage Tower, and when he tried to deliver some sort of payment to them, he’d just find the money returned to him through Sakura. Eventually, his student had grown tired of their ridiculous back and forth, and had put her foot down on the whole deal. Kakashi still recieved gifts to his home and office. He still couldn’t pay them back. 

  
  


He intends to shunshin back to his home, but he is stopped by a soft hand landing on his shoulder. Kakashi turns to find Sakura’s mother, a bag of groceries hung on her right forearm. Like her daughter, the woman seems to have forgotten to trim her hair to her usual length, and the Rokudaime makes it a point to compliment her on the change. 

  
  


“Such a flatterer, as usual, Hokage-sama,” she smiles, “what are you doing out and about so late? Some craving that needs to be fulfilled?” 

  
  


Kakashi stares at the bag in his hand, with the dried leaves and berries, and he nods as he explains, “I’m making something special for Sakura, actually.” 

  
  


The expression that takes over Mebuki’s face is a mixture of happy and upset. He doesn’t know how that is possible, but the way her mouth curls into a sad smile reminds him of the way Sakura sometimes would look over Sasuke and Naruto when they fought over silly things. Like mother like daughter, he supposed. 

  
  


“You and Yamato-san take such good care of my daughter,” she says, finally, “I’ve been concerned for her since the war ended. I know her career has changed her, but I’m still frightened she needs more help than she lets on.” 

  
  


He doesn’t know what to say, but the woman looks like she could use some reassurance, “She’s stronger than she looks,” he tries, “but war can be especially difficult for medics like her sometimes.” 

  
  


“I know I can’t ever begin to understand her, so I am glad she has you and all her shinobi friends,” Mebuki changes her bag from one arm to the other, “Please keep looking over her. Ino-chan told me last week that Sakura hadn’t re-signed her apartment lease for next year. I’m happy to know she has somewhere to land.” 

  
  


Kakashi hadn’t known that, but he schools his expression into neutrality with a pleased smile, “Let me walk you home, Haruno-san. As payment for the bookcase your husband crafted for us a month ago.” 

  
  


He takes her bag before she can protest, and they walk together further into quartier eight, where the Haruno household stood. The building was on the same spot as it had been all those years ago, when the Sandaime had taken Kakashi to visit the homes of his new genin team, but it was different from how it used to be. The lower level was still the designated space for the woodshop owned by Sakura’s father, while half of the upper level still held rows upon rows of colorful fabrics and shimmery brocades with which Mebuki created both beautiful and practical clothing. From the street, Kakashi could see the outlined figure of Haruno Kizashi, who stood reading something by the window. 

  
  


“You’re very kind, Kakashi-sama,” the woman thanks him, grabbing the bag he’d taken from her before, “Please, say hello to my daughter for me, will you? Tell her we miss her being around.” 

  
  


Kakashi nods, “I’ll be sure to tell her that,” and then, because he doesn’t know any self-regulation, he adds, “You can visit her at the Hatake compound any day. You’re welcome in my home whenever you please.” 

  
  


Mebuki smiles, and leans to press a short kiss to his cheek. The gesture is maternal, and something very foreign to him, but he accepts it gratefully. Kakashi watches the woman walk inside what used to be his student’s old home, and shunshins back to his home. 

  
  


When he steps into his house, Sakura is already sitting at the kitchen table, her back to the entrance, so Kakashi gets a front-row view of the Hatake symbol placed neatly on her back. She’s pulled her hair to one side, flipping through a book Yamato probably had given her from their library, and Kakashi's breath catches in his throat. The red emblem is a stark contrast against the white fabric of the shirt, and it occurs to him that red has always been Sakura’s color. 

  
  


“Welcome home,” Yamato greets him from the stove. “I’ve started dinner, if you don’t mind.” 

  
  


“I’m home,” he answers, and ruffles Sakura’s hair as he passes. “It's fine. I’m gonna make a quick experiment.”

  
  


// 

  
  


He calls Ino into his office, and tries not to make too much of a fuss. 

  
  


If Sakura were to find out about his meddling, he’d never hear the end of it. Kakashi is the Hokage and one of the most powerful ninja Konoha has ever created. He treats this gathering of intel like he would any mission, and waits for the head of the Yamanaka clan to report to his office. Yamato doesn’t ask, but he knows from the way his partner lurks on the edges of the room at the Hokage tower that the ANBU Commander is as curious as usual. 

  
  


“Whatever this is about,” Ino starts talking just as she walks through the door, “Sai’s latest art incursion was  _ not _ my fault and I don’t think I should be put on cleaning duty  _ again _ .” 

  
  


Kakashi thinks none of the former rookies actually respect him. It probably has something to do with Sakura and Naruto, but he’s stopped trying to change his reputation with the younger adults. 

  
  


“None of that,” he says, with a wave of his hand, “Sai has busied himself with stained glass ever since reconstruction started in the Hatake compound. Aside from some minor cuts, he’s doing pretty good with this particular art incursion--you should visit. We built a greenhouse. He’s very proud of the windows he created for that one.” 

  
  


Ino looks pleased, “He actually asked if it would hurt the plants--he’s very thoughtful.” 

  
  


“That he is,” Kakashi agrees. “Anyways, that’s not what I wanted to talk to you about. It’s about Sakura.” 

  
  


The blonde’s face changes dramatically, “I’ve been  _ dying _ to talk to you about this for  _ weeks _ ,” she whines, “but she swore me to secrecy, and I  _ know _ this room is sound-sealed, but we can all agree Haruno Sakura has a creepy way of finding everything out.” 

  
  


“What can you tell me about Sakura not re-signing her leasing contract?” he asks, right off the bat, because if he lets Ino give a report on her own she’ll probably ramble on and on about it. 

  
  


“She told me she was thinking about taking an extended mission from Yamato-taicho,” Ino answers, biting one of her nails, “Sakura was so sure that she was going to get it, so she told her landlord she wouldn’t be renewing her lease, that expires in two months. She started wrapping things up at the hospital, too, which is why she’s been taking so many extra shifts recently.” 

  
  


Kakashi frowns under his mask. Yamato’s chakra flares once, a sign that he is upset and wants to know more. The Hokage complies, “Did she tell you what mission she was planning on taking?” 

  
  


Ino shakes her head, “She wouldn’t tell me, just that she had found one in ANBU filing that would allow her to take an extended leave from Konoha.” 

  
  


It’s Kakashi’s turn to think about that. Sakura had assisted Yamato on some ANBU related missions after the war, but neither Tsunade nor himself had added her name to the ANBU roster. She had been allowed those requests because the black-ops division didn’t really have a medical team, so they needed the resources. Nevertheless, Yamato had been very clear about her involvement, and made sure she was only there for support and treatment. Kakashi knew she hadn’t liked it, but Sakura didn’t belong in ANBU and he knew it better than anyone. 

  
  


“Can she do that?” Ino asks then, a frown curling her lips down, “Go through ANBU filing to find a mission?” 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t say it, but his old team pretty much took all the liberties they wanted. Ino would probably not believe it from straight-A Haruno Sakura, but the truth was that his former student was really good at finding legal loopholes that could serve in her favor. She had gotten away with a lot of things during the last eleven months or so. She wasn’t as revered in the village as Sasuke and Naruto, but people looked up to her as the second coming of Tsunade, and most shinobi respected her and feared her equally. Whoever was in the filing desk at ANBU HQ probably hadn’t stood a chance against her when she asked for the missions’ catalogue. 

  
  


“You will come to learn that Sakura does a lot of things,” Kakashi sighs, “Thank you for coming, Ino. If there’s anything else I should know about this situation, please let me know.” 

  
  


Ino nods. She turns to leave, but then stops just as her hand reaches for the doorknob. The blonde looks over her shoulder at Kakashi, “You should ask the Jonin Four--she’s been spending more time with them lately.” 

  
  


_ The Jonin Four _ . Kakashi found it interesting how every generation had exclusive names for their little groups. If the only four jonin-level shinobi from the Konoha 13 had been spending more time together, then it would make sense why Sakura and Neji had gotten closer. He felt a little bad about not having realized, but the job of a Hokage wasn’t very compatible with his former position as jonin instructor of Team Kakashi.

  
  


“I’ll reach out to the other three,” Kakashi answers. “Again, thank you for coming.” 

  
  


Ino bids him farewell and makes him promise he’ll tell her whatever he finds. As soon as the door clicks closed again and her footsteps draw further away, Yamato’s form solidifies from one of his walls into the space right next to Kakashi’s chair. The ANBU Commander takes his mask off, clipping it to hang at his hip.

  
  


“She hasn’t come to ask me for any mission,” Tenzo says, quickly, “If anything, she’s been telling me she’s quite content with life at the hospital.” 

  
  


“It’s strange of her to hide her intentions like this,” Kakashi leans back on his chair, pinching the bridge of his nose. “The last time she tried to keep something from us, she was on her merry way to kill Sasuke.” 

  
  


He feels more than sees Yamato’s grimace to this, “What do you think this is about?” 

  
  


The Hokage sighs. When his partner breaks protocol to press a comforting hand to the side of his neck, he leans greedily into the touch, “Nothing good, probably. You know our kids like to attract trouble.” 

  
  


“They get that from you,” Tenzo jokes, and then leans to press a kiss to his temple. “Call Lee. He’ll be the most forthcoming with information, if he has any.” 

  
  


// 

  
  


They don’t know what’s happening to Sakura. Shikamaru comes into his office first, as his office is just down the hallway from Kakashi’s, and while he had tried to make sense of her behavior, he couldn’t offer anything at all other than his own observations in her change of demeanour. Lee and Neji come in together, and while they’re both more than gratuitous with their intel, neither of them really knew anything of what Sakura was planning. 

  
  


It drives Kakashi up the wall. Yamato spends most of their nights at home worried about Sakura. 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t want to alert the rest of the team, because he knows it will end in disaster. Naruto would either make a scene at the hospital or at quartier seven, and Sakura would never forgive him for that. Sai’s questions would become more prying than curious, which would make Sakura defensive, and then they’d have no way to figure things out. Sasuke and Sakura have been avoiding each other outside of weekly team dinners, but Kakashi knows he’d be just as capable of making a scene or making her just as uncomfortable as the other two. 

  
  


He has to fix this one by himself. Yamato is too soft on her and can’t (or won’t) see things clearly, and Kakashi owes Sakura for a lot of things of the past. 

  
  


All things considered, Sakura doesn’t suspect a thing. She still takes on too much work at the hospital (even when Shizune tries to keep her out), and she comes by the Hatake compound every second or third night to ask for asylum. Kakashi has lent her so many of his older shirts that he knows none of those will ever come back into his closet. They don’t fit him anymore, so he doesn’t mind, but he’d never taken Sakura for a compulsive clothing stealer. 

  
  


Not only has she been ransacking his drawer steadily, but the boudoir in the guest room has suddenly started filling with red and pink garments embroidered with the Haruno merchant circle. Yamato keeps doing the laundry she leaves behind, and when she never takes them home, he places them in the drawers of the spare room in an attempt to get her to notice. 

  
  


She never does.

  
  


During the last week of the month, Sakura sleeps in the guest room every night. She prepares dinner three out of those seven days, and offers to do the laundry that weekend. Neither he nor Tenzo question it, but it starts becoming increasingly clear to Kakashi that Sakura really is going to ask for that mission after all. According to Ino, her lease should be up in about two to three weeks, if not less, and although she hasn’t come close to actually asking, her actions point towards someone who is tying loose ends. It might’ve helped delay her actions that Yamato figured out which mission Ino could possibly have been referring to from ANBU operative Owl, and had already taken it out of the roster. Kakashi hardly thought she’d fall for that, but it was a valiant effort. 

  
  


On Friday, when they’re supposed to meet the rest of the team for dinner at Sai’s place, Kakashi finds Sakura curled under the sheets in the guest room. She looks tiny under there, but her hair peeks out from under her hiding spot, and Uhei and Guruko are curled up on either side of her protectively. 

  
  


“Sakura?” Kakashi asks by the door, knocking on the doorframe like an obnoxious father, “Is everything alright?” 

  
  


There’s only a hum coming from the lump in bed. Uhei shakes his head from his position on what Kakashi presumes to be Sakura’s back. 

  
  


“Do you want to talk about something?” 

  
  


He’s not good at this. Kakashi knows he’s not good with emotions, given how he has handled  _ his _ trauma during his life, but he had already resolved to be the one to fix this for her. When he doesn’t receive much of an answer from her but a small sniffle, he sighs and walks towards the bed. With a wave of his hand, he asks Uhei to scoot over, and sits on the vacated space. 

  
  


“Sakura, can you come out of there?”

  
  


“No.” 

  
  


Her answer is muffled and Kakashi would laugh if her stubbornness wasn’t making this interaction harder for him. He grabs the edges of the blanket, and starts pulling it away from her until he can see her wide, green eyes. Her cheeks are bright with color, as well as the corner of her eyes, and he feels like the oxygen in this room isn’t quite enough. She hides behind her hands, trying to roll away from him, but something in Kakashi won’t allow that. He carefully grabs her shoulders, pulling at her a little until she’s facing him again, and then he helps sit her up so he can bring her towards his chest. She tenses under the touch for a second, and Kakashi wonders if he did something wrong, before she collapses against him with a sob that will haunt him for the next couple of weeks. 

  
  


She cries into his chest. It reminds him too much of how she used to cry as a genin. Back then, Kakashi would’ve told her all the lies in the world to keep her from spilling more tears, but it seems disingenuous to do it after they’ve gone through so much together. He allows her that moment of letting go, simply holding her for strength. Fifteen minutes pass when Yamato comes to peek into her room with a question that dies on his lips at the sight. Kakashi shakes his head and tells his partner to go on ahead to Sai’s apartment with instructions to explain that Sakura is very sick and probably contagious, so they had both stayed in for the night. 

  
  


“We should just go,” Sakura manages to say, voice hoarse from crying. “Naruto will come banging on the door if you tell him I’m sick.” 

  
  


“Hence the contagious part, pup,” Kakashi smiles down at her, petting her hair. “Your captain knows how to deal with your teammates. They’ll be fine. It’s only one night, right, Tenzo?” 

  
  


At the door, Tenzo nods, smiling sweetly at Sakura, “They’ll miss you, but they’re big boys now. I’ll bring you back some leftovers, alright?” 

  
  


Kakashi nods, and Yamato is off before Sakura can complain again. 

  
  


“You want to talk to me about something?” Kakashi says, after a little while. “It’s alright if you don’t want to, I just want to make sure you’re alright.” 

  
  


“I’m fine,” Sakura answers, almost automatically, but something in the way she looks away from him makes him pause to allow her some thought. “I’ve just been--dealing with some stuff, I guess.” 

  
  


“Ah, I see,” Kakashi says, sagely. “Dealing with stuff is always difficult. Have you spoken to anyone about the stuff you’re currently dealing with? I hear your parents are kind of worried about you.” 

  
  


Sakura sighs, pushing further away from Kakashi to speak to him head on. Her cheeks are still blotchy red from crying, and her eyes are red rimmed and puffier than fifteen minutes ago. Kakashi soldiers on for her sake. 

  
  


“Not really,” she admits, biting her bottom lip. “I’ve been--there’s been a lot to do at the hospital. People are still coming out of their injuries and there’s a lot of work to do.” 

  
  


“Yes, Shizune and Ino have told me,” he nods. “They’ve also told me you’re taking unnecessary shifts.” 

  
  


“That’s not--” 

  
  


Kakashi brings a hand up to stop her, “Now, Sakura, the Sage knows I’m not the best at dealing with my own stuff. You of all people know very well how bad I am at actually reaching out to people--that doesn’t mean you get to do what I did.” 

  
  


She looks like she’ll retort, so he keeps talking. 

  
  


“You’re overworking yourself and neglecting your own signs of distress in favor of burying whatever stuff it is you’re dealing with.” He says, voice level. “I’m actually disappointed in how long I let this go on--I had too much faith that you could do this yourself, but it seems you’re as stubborn as I am.”

  
  


“No one is as stubborn as you,” Sakura says, crossing her arms across her chest. 

  
  


“I guess you’re technically right,” Kakashi shrugs. “After all, you  _ are _ more headstrong than me. You get that from Tsunade, I think.” 

  
  


Sakura doesn’t look amused. Kakashi isn’t either, but he’s trying to diffuse the tension in the room. Sage knows he can’t have this kid blow a wall on their home. 

  
  


“My point is, Sakura,” Kakashi continues. “Ino’s told me you’re days away from losing your apartment. Your mother is under the impression that you’re staying in my home permanently--which, before you jump to conclusions, is not a problem. Yamato and I would be happy to have you around if you wanted to--except I know that you were at ANBU headquarters some months ago asking around for the extended-leave missions’ catalogue. That, by the way, you’re  _ not _ allowed to peek into if you’re not an ANBU captain.” 

  
  


“I blame your security system,” Sakura bites back. “Operative Owl was kind enough to allow me entrance to the filing--that’s on you and not on me.” 

  
  


Kakashi nods, “Yes, pup, you’re right. Which is why, as you have noticed, our very own ANBU Commander has made sure that the mission you’re interested in is out of the roster and already given to an  _ actual _ ANBU operative.” 

This, it turns out, might’ve been the wrong thing to say, because Sakura goes from sassy to angry in 0.3 seconds. The girl stands up from her bed abruptly, towering for a second over Kakashi while she says, “That wouldn’t be a problem if you’d just let me go into ANBU.” 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t know if she knows this, but she’s more like an angry puppy than a ferocious wolf right now. With a sigh, the Rokudaime Hokage stands up from his place in her bed, but doesn’t move to crowd her space. She’d take that as a challenge, and the last thing he wants right now is this to turn into a fight. 

  
  


“ANBU is no place for you, Sakura,” he says. “You’re strong and you’re insanely skilled--your Mokuton replica is enough a testament to this--but no matter how much shinobi dynamics have changed after the war, ANBU is still a dark place to be in.” 

  
  


“I could be doing something to change that!” she tells him. “Don’t you believe in me?” 

  
  


“It’s not about that and you know it,” Kakashi grits back, trying to keep his cool. “There is no other person whom I trust the way I trust you. I’ve trusted you with my life and the lives of this entire village because you are kind and compassionate. ANBU will beat that out of you, Sakura, why do you want to be there so badly?” 

  
  


“I can’t be in this village anymore!” she snaps, tears pooling in her eyes again. “All I see here are ghosts, and the reminder that maybe I’m  _ not _ strong enough! I need a goddamn break! Why won’t you give me that?” 

  
  


It’s not the volume of her voice, but the strength of her words that take him aback. Kakashi has to keep quiet for a moment, trying to process what exactly she means by what she’s saying, before he takes one small step towards her, reaching out to hold her hand. 

  
  


“I need you to talk to me, pup,” he answers, softly. “Please, just share your burden with me.” 

  
  


She scrunches up her nose, like she’s trying her best not to cry, but fails at keeping the tears away. This time, he doesn’t pull her towards him, but the hold he has on her hand tightens until their knuckles are white under the pressure. 

  
  


“I can’t look at them,” she says, in between sobs. “I can’t look at my friends in the face anymore. I wasn’t there to save my best friend’s father, and I barely got Neji to pull through. There was so much  _ death _ in the medical camp--I know I trained for it, I thought I was desensitized, but so many of those people were people I  _ knew _ .” 

  
  


He feels like she’s not done, but she’s thinking her next words carefully, like she doesn’t know how to put into a sentence the overwhelming feelings she has. 

  
  


“Naruto and Sasuke lost their arms,” she says, like that was anything but  _ their _ fault. “Yamato-taicho could’ve died with how much chakra they took from him. How do I deal with the overwhelming evidence that I am  _ useless _ in the face of my teammate’s lineage? Not to mention how stupid I was before the war even started! Trying to take on Sasuke by myself and almost getting myself  _ killed _ !” 

  
  


And there’s something there, in the way that Sakura says that last word, that makes Kakashi think that maybe Sakura had been avoiding Sasuke instead of the other way around. He doesn’t mention it, however, and simply waits a beat to figure out if she’s done with her rant or if she has anything more to say. 

  
  


After she’s kept quiet for a while, Kakashi decides to speak up, as softly as he can, “Pup, look at me, please.” 

  
  


She does, slowly. Her green eyes look the brightest they ever have, and Kakashi curses the day he was made jonin instructor of a girl he couldn’t give comfort to. He’s never been good at the emotional aspect of his job, and he failed Sakura before he failed Sasuke and Naruto. Seeing her like this, broken and fighting the demons he had tried to keep away from her, it spurs something in him. He’d never consider himself a family man, but he’d give anything to protect his students. 

  
  


“I wish none of you had to go through war,” Kakashi says, brushing a thumb across her cheek to wipe some of her tears. “I know how strong you all are, but seeing you in the battlefield was scary even for me. I had to push Sai past his limits with the sealing; had to watch Naruto take on the strongest of the strongest. Sakura, you realize you punched a goddess, right?” 

  
  


Laughter bubbles from her chest, high pitched and almost childish, and it warms his insides little by little. 

  
  


“She had it coming.” 

  
  


Kakashi laughs back, and pulls her into a hug, “Yes, she did, pup.” 

  
  


They stay silent for a little while. Kakashi holds her head to his chest, and focuses intently on the steady beat of her heart against the underside of his ribcage. He’s never noticed how small she really is. She kept him upright for almost the entire war, and her monstrous strength made it impossible to think of her as small. She had broad shoulders and strong arms, and her will shone brighter than many others. Kakashi had always seen her as a towering force. A woman to be reckoned with. 

  
  


“Sakura?” 

  
  


The pink haired girl hums against his chest. 

  
  


“I know you’ll hate me for this,” he says. “But come Monday I’m giving you a two week break off active duty. You can spend it however you want, but I don’t want you to be working or training. Take some time for yourself.” 

  
  


Sakura groans, but doesn’t challenge his orders. He takes this as a sign to continue. 

  
  


“And I’d like you to start moving your things into this room,” his student pushes away from him abruptly, which makes him smile a little. “You already have enough clothes here, and I know Yamato will like having your Mokuton around because I keep killing our flowers.” 

  
  


“Sensei, are you--?” 

  
  


“I’m serious,” he answers. “Your mom’s worried about you, Ino’s worried about you, the Jonin Four are hounding my ass for answers on your strange behavior. I just want to make sure you have a support system, and I know going back to a civilian household might be difficult after war time. Let me and Yamato take care of you for a little while. There’s no shame in that.”

  
  


Sakura stares at him for a long second, before a smile grows on her lips and she buries her face back into his chest, “Okay, sensei.” 

  
  


Kakashi smiles and buries his nose on her pink hair, kissing the crown of her head. The mask doesn’t come off, but he knows Sakura understands. 

  
  


“I’ll help you move all your stuff in during the weekend, pup. We can paint the walls pink if you want.” 

  
  


Sakura whines, low in her chest, and he laughs merrily. He’ll fix this for her. She’ll be okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Introducing this chapter: the Jonin Four, who have all of my heart. Also introducing this chapter: Neji is alive because I wake up everyday choosing violence against what was his character arc in the show. Here are some fun facts on world building specifically spoken about in this chapter: 
> 
> -Sakura started training with Tsunade and moved out of her parents' home almost immediately. This is based a little around this lovely fic called [Prodigal Sons by Fiction_Over_Fact](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15482664) that I read a couple of months ago and actually inspired other Sakura-related fics that I'll eventually write about. 
> 
> -I'm weird and I added politics to Konoha's distribution. The elder's excuses are always how civilians can be traumatized by shinobi affairs and how they could get tangled in something bad if they're all mixed up. Because of that, there are 7 shinobi districts, and 7 civilian districts. Shinobi districts are counted from the inside to the outside (so, the closer you are to Hokage Tower, the smaller the number--Hatake compound is in shinobi district 1, Yamanaka compound is in shinobi district 2) and civilian districts are counted from the outside to the inside (so the first district you come across when you walk through the doors is civilian district 1, then the 2nd, and so on and so forth). Why did I decide this? I honestly have no idea, but that's why Sakura stays at Yamato's apartment often--she lives in shinobi district 6, which is far away from the hospital because it's considered a first-generation district, like Sai mentioned last chapter. There are two markets, but the bigger one is in the seventh civilian district.
> 
> -Remember that Kakashi is an unreliable narrator. He doesn't know to a full extent what his loved ones are going through, and everything he thinks about the situations he sees are at most observations or speculation. Sakura's relationship with her teammates AND the village is different now and Kakashi can see that much, but he doesn't know exactly why (and so we don't know either). 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it! Leave a comment and tell me your thoughts!


	3. sai

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes he doesn't know what to do about Sai. He was already sixteen when he became part of Team Kakashi, and yet, it's like he's discovering the world for the very first time. Kakashi just wants to have faith that Sai will be alright after everything--after ROOT, after losing his place in the world and finding it again...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sai is a character that is very dear to me. It makes me really sad that he's almost never included in anything Team 7 related, and how people insist that he's not really a part of them. Although the OG Team 7 definitely have a lot more history between them than he does with any of them, Sai was still integral to major plot points in Shippuden--especially when it came to Naruto and Sakura. 
> 
> I forgot to send this to my beta beforehand, so every mistake made here is my own and there probably will be some jsjs I still thank Lyssa for being such a wonderful friend and first reader. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who commented last chapter how much they're liking this series! I hope not to disappoint! Please enjoy!

Sakura moves in without too much of a hassle. 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t tell the boys to come help because Sakura doesn’t tell them either, so he chooses to allow her her privacy. Lee, Ino and Kiba come in per her request Sunday morning, and together, they set up her room with her belongings. Not much had survived Pain’s invasion, but she still had some things she’d grown attached to. Ino and Kiba spend too much time arguing about furniture placement, while Lee and Sakura haul stuff around from one place to the other. By noon, Yamato comes in through the door to find Kakashi serving the kids lemonade, and Akamaru barking up a storm in the backyard while he chases after Shiba. They’re all tired and sweaty, but Sakura is officially moved into the Hatake compound. 

  
  


“How was moving day?” Tenzo asks, unclipping his arm guards and dropping them on the bin by the door where they leave all discarded uniform pieces for maintenance and washing.. “Any casualties?” 

  
  


Kiba awards him a toothy grin, “We may have dented the wall next to her window, but we fixed it.” 

  
  


Sakura huffs around the rim of her lemonade glass, glaring at Kiba across the table despite her feet being propped on his lap, “ _ You _ and Ino dented my wall cause you were bitching about where to put my closet, and then  _ I  _ fixed it. Don’t lump yourself in with me.” 

  
  


“Oh, look at me,” Ino mocks, her voice turning nasal to impersonate a strange version of Sakura. “I’m Haruno Sakura-san and I have the replica Mokuton. Don’t lump yourself in with me, you mere mortal.” 

  
  


Sakura sticks her tongue out to Ino. Before the fight can escalate, Lee interrupts with one of his normal speeches about youth and how good it is to see Commander Yamato back home with his family. The blatant statement makes something warm bloom in Kakashi, so much that he almost makes a mess while serving a glass of lemonade for his partner, who stops the pitcher before they have to pull out the mop. By the time Kakashi goes back to sit at the table with the kids and Yamato sits next to him, the topic of conversation has already strayed back to a fight. Kakashi appreciates Sakura looking better, but he’s still worried that she’d consciously chosen not to talk to the others in Team 7 about her moving. 

  
  


While he mulls over his thoughts, the doorbell by the entrance of the compound rings. No one uses that blasted thing unless they’re on official Konoha business or they’re Sai. Seeing as this weekend Kakashi had explicitly told Shikamaru to not bother him because he had things to do (important things, his student needed him), he assumes Sai is probably waiting by the compound door. Sakura seems to know this, as she stands up from her place and hurries over to the intercom at the door to buzz him in. 

  
  


“Come on inside, Sai,” Sakura says through the communication device. “You know it’s open for you.” 

  
  


Over the receiver, Sai’s voice crackles with static as he gives his assent. Before Sakura can come to sit down at the table, the seal master is opening the front door and waving hello to everyone inside. 

  
  


“Sorry about the clutter of boxes,” Kakashi calls out from his place leaning over Yamato’s shoulder. “We were unpacking.” 

  
  


“Yes, Sakura told me yesterday she was going to be moving in,” the boy answers. “I wanted to come help, but it seems my mission went on a little longer than I intended.” 

  
  


Yamato waves his hand to dismiss him, and urges him to come sit down with them, “You can hand in your report tomorrow. You could’ve asked for the day off.” 

  
  


Sai shakes his head, coming to sit at the table on the chair Sakura had just vacated next to Ino, “I’m afraid I was all packed up already. Besides, Sasuke-kun already struggles with team efforts, so I wanted to make sure he didn’t feel unwelcome with the new squad.” 

  
  


“Ah, of course!” Lee answered excitedly. “How is our friend doing in ANBU? I had a combined mission with the ANBU earlier this month--he seemed to be well adjusted.” 

  
  


“He’s doing his best,” Sai answers, pleasantly. “He doesn’t lose his temper with the newer recruits, which is already a good sign. Recently, he’s been making an effort to talk to the other squad members before and after missions.” 

  
  


“How’s he doing with the medic-nin in the squad?” Yamato asks next, taking the moment to get an unofficial report before Sai has to turn in his official one. “Operative Sparrow told me they were having trouble getting him to accept any medical treatment.” 

  
  


“He let Operative Otter treat his minor injuries this time,” the squad captain says. “I had to insist, but I think he’s starting to come along.” 

  
  


“He’s refusing medical treatment?” Ino asks, brows furrowing in the middle. “Whenever he’s by at the hospital I don’t have any problems with him.” 

  
  


Lee brings a hand up to his face, stroking his chin pensively, “That is most interesting. Last mission Sasuke-kun insisted that our medic heal everyone else before even thinking about getting treatment himself.” 

  
  


“It’s not the treatment itself,” Kiba shrugs, sipping at his lemonade. “He just doesn’t like people touching him unless he knows them somehow.” 

  
  


Kakashi turns to look at the Inuzuka boy, eyebrow raised, “Now, when did you become an expert on Sasuke Uchiha?” 

  
  


Kiba rolls his eyes, “It’s just obvious. I went with him and Commander Yamato on their long mission to Kumo. He only allowed me, Akamaru and Yamato into his personal bubble.” 

  
  


“That might be an issue with continued medical treatment,” Sakura sighs. “Shizune has been trying to get him to sit down for an evaluation of his eyes, just to make sure everything’s alright. If he’s having a problem with touch, that might be the reason why he keeps postponing.” 

  
  


“I’m sure he’d be fine if you did it,” Kiba said. “You’re his teammate. You also healed him in the battlefield, right? He must be used to you already.” 

  
  


Kakashi panics. They hadn’t really talked about Sakura’s feelings for Sasuke, but he knew there was something there that his female student wasn’t telling him about her relationship (or the lack thereof) with her old teammate. Sai, thankfully, seems to catch up on the way Sakura tenses next to him, and he jumps in with a clean save. 

  
  


“I’ll speak to him about a check-up with Ino,” he smiles, pleasantly. “He’s much better about his current squad. So as long as he accepts medical treatment from Otter, at least, then I don’t have to worry about him getting fatally wounded.” 

  
  


“You’re right, Sai,” Yamato answers, also understanding the need for a change of topic. “So, anyone want to show me Sakura’s new room? Did Kakashi finally convince you on the pink paint?” 

  
  


The conversation changes from there, for which Kakashi is grateful. They give Yamato a tour of Sakura’s new room (green walls included) and then sit back down to unwind watching a movie in the communal area. Akamaru and the rest of the ninken come back to cuddle in the negative spaces between the occupants of the house, whimpering dramatically until someone around them gives them some form of pet or belly scratch. Kakashi is glad to see Sakura so relaxed, cuddled up with Ino under a blanket while they share comments on the main characters and the terrible plot. 

  
  


Eventually, all non-Team Kakashi shinobi file out of the house one after the other. Sakura tells Ino that she’s welcome to visit her here whenever she wants, and that their monthly ‘bitch talk’ is still a thing that’s happening. Kiba, with Lee’s enthusiastic help, has to haul Akamaru out of the house, and they’re followed by Kakashi’s yapping ninken to the edge of the Hatake compound until he calls them back with a stern whistle. 

  
  


When the dogs have found their way back to the house, and Kakashi has come back inside, Sakura and Sai are nowhere to be found. Yamato is coming out of their room, decked in his night clothes, wearing Kakashi’s shirt, and he motions for his partner to come along quietly. The Rokudaime follows the ANBU Commander down the hall and into what has become their library over the months they’ve lived here together. Before they actually go inside, though, Yamato stops just by the threshold and brings his arm out to stop Kakashi, pointing at the corner of the room that’s visible, by the big window that looks out to their garden. 

  
  


Sai sits cross-legged in the chair Sakura’s father had crafted for them when they had just moved in, a sketchpad open on his legs while he looks out towards the cherry blossom tree that’s still some months away from blossoming. Sakura sits on the windowsill, her back to the outside, one arm draped over her bent knee, as she speaks in whispers with her teammate. They’re sharing a moment, and Kakashi wonders if Sakura finally gave up on bottling her feelings and is reaching out to someone that can help her. Sai would not have been Kakashi’s first option, given how he’s still trying to figure out his own personality in the aftermath of the war, but it seems like they’re comfortable around each other. He knows Sai and Sakura were close friends, especially now that Ino and Sai seemed to be becoming closer, but seeing them like this makes him realize how little he really knows of his students’ lives sometimes. 

  
  


“ _ Let’s go to bed, _ ” he signs out to Yamato in standard Konoha sign language to avoid the kids noticing. “ _ They’ll be alright. _ ” 

  
  


// 

  
  


By Monday, Kakashi has officially relieved Sakura of her duty for the next two weeks. He tells her she is welcome to spend them how she wishes, as long as it doesn’t involve studying, training or working, and ends up allowing her Mokuton-based training twice a week just to keep her from going stir crazy. She leaves his office with a too-happy spring to her step, and he wonders if he’s going soft in old age. Behind him, Yamato hides a chuckle with the pretense of a cough. 

  
  


Later in the day, Naruto comes around to ask what he has dubbed as ‘Hokage questions’. This time, he’s managed to force Sasuke out of hiding, only to make him sit in a corner in Kakashi’s office like some preying animal. It makes the Rokudaime want to laugh, but he appreciates the company more than he can actually put into words. Naruto talks a mile a minute while he tries to keep up, and Yamato offers translation whenever Kakashi stares too long into space and doesn’t catch whatever his successor was previously saying. 

  
  


Come noon, the boys offer to pay for lunch, and when they come back to his office for another round of ‘harass Kakashi over the Hokage position he’s not yet used to’, Sai is standing almost too tensely by the door, waiting. He offers them a small smile when they approach, waving a hand that looks like it might be shaking before it disappears into his back again. It strikes Kakashi as odd, but he invites him to come into the office and asks him if this is a private matter. 

  
  


“It’s sort of a private matter,” Sai says, unsure. “But it’s also of political interest, I believe. It’s okay if Naruto and Sasuke-kun stay, if that’s what you mean to ask, Kakashi-sensei.” 

  
  


Sasuke looks uncomfortable in his corner now, but he doesn’t make a move to leave. Probably because Naruto is not making a move to leave, either. Kakashi thinks Sai will combust any minute, if the way his shoulders are tensed up are any indication. 

  
  


“What can I do for you, Sai?” 

  
  


He takes in a deep, shuddering breath. Behind Kakashi, Yamato’s chakra shoots forward to comfort Sai.

  
  


“I want to know if there were any recovered files of Danzo’s office,” the ANBU captain says, tone icy. “I have reason to believe he might’ve kept information on the children he’d taken from orphanages and smaller villages.” 

  
  


Kakashi feels more than sees Sasuke’s shoulders tensing even further. Yamato’s chakra seeks him, too. 

  
  


“And for what reason do you wish to see these records?” 

  
  


“I’d like to--” Sai stops there, looking unsure for just a second, before he picks up his sentence again. “I’d like to pursue an investigation. On myself. Where I come from, more specifically.” 

  
  


“Sai, are you sure--” Kakashi tries to question, but is stopped by Sai’s steady voice. 

  
  


“I’ve made up my mind, Rokudaime-sama,” he says. “I’ve spoken about this with the people close to me. If there is any chance I can find out more about myself, I’d appreciate it.” 

  
  


There’s a beat of silence, before the ANBU captain is speaking again. 

  
  


“If it is a conflicting request, I understand,” he continues, almost too quietly. “I know those records are of great political interest to a lot of people in the village, which is why I’ve come to place a special request for myself and Haruno Sakura to be able to look into them.” 

  
  


This takes Kakashi aback, so he asks, “You want to include Sakura in this request?” 

  
  


“Yes,” Sai nods once, sternly. “She’s expressed an interest in helping me figure out my past. I don’t think I could share that with anyone else.” 

  
  


Kakashi sighs, propping his elbow up on the table and his head on his open palm, “Sai, you realize you’re asking a lot of me? Those are sealed records for a reason.” 

  
  


“I completely understand, sir,” his last student says. “As I’ve explained, I will be patient if you’re not allowed to show them to me.” 

  
  


“You’ll be patient, but will you be accepting?” 

  
  


Sai considers this for a moment, biting the inside of his cheek. Over the past months, Kakashi has been the honored guest to many of his new expressions, something he had been happy to share with the boy. Curiosity had been the first emotion he’d properly shown on his face, something Kakashi thought was very on brand for him. This expression, however, went past others Kakashi had already learned. It didn’t look like Sai was merely mulling over what was asked of him, but instead, it seemed as if he were thinking how to best answer. 

  
  


“I’m afraid there is a high possibility I might try to get information somewhere else,” Sai finally says after a while. “Were the records not a possibility, I’d have to find a way to get information in different ways.” 

  
  


“Sai,” Naruto groans, speaking up for the first time since Sai had gotten to the office. “If you’re gonna try and infiltrate the Hokage archives you’re not supposed to tell the Hokage!” 

  
  


Sai looks puzzled over at his teammate, dark brows furrowed in the middle, “I was under the impression the Hokage was the one person we couldn’t lie to.” 

  
  


“It’s Kakashi,” Sasuke answers, butting in on the joke that’s Kakashi’s entire career. “You suffered through being his student, you’re allowed to lie to him.” 

  
  


“You’re all disrespectful,” Kakashi says, deadpan. 

  
  


While Sai is trying to understand what he’s done wrong, Kakashi turns to assess him again. He seems more relaxed now that he’s said his piece, which the Rokudaime is thankful for, but Kakashi has no idea where this request is actually coming from. He doesn’t think Sakura had gotten the idea into him, all things considered, but it might be a possibility that Sai was beginning to feel more and more ostracized from his comrades and friends instead of feeling a bigger sense of belonging. He knew it was hard for Naruto to relate to Sakura’s problems with her parents, and Sasuke hadn’t attended any of the massive get-togethers the thirteen had tried to invite him to for fear of rejection. Sai had been trying to be more sociable (he helped Ino at the flower shop on his free weekends and had started to visit the Inuzuka kernel to play with the puppies as of recently) so Kakashi hadn’t been worried about him. 

  
  


Like so many things about his students, maybe Kakashi just didn’t  _ really _ know Sai’s feelings. 

  
  


“I’m gonna do my best, Sai,” Kakashi finally says, which makes Sai snap to attention. “I have to consult people before I give you and Sakura permission to go into whatever’s left of Danzo’s records. At the end of it, we might not be able to allow it, but I’m going to try.” 

  
  


Happiness and gratefulness, Kakashi has found out, look like they belong perfectly on Sai’s face. 

  
  


// 

  
  


It’s a month later when the council and Tsunade  _ finally  _ give their approval for Sai’s request. To Kakashi, that month passes like they were six, and he’s exhausted by the end of it. He loves and cares for Sai, and he curses the day he became so soft towards his students. They deserve only the best, and if Sai’s best was learning about his past, then on Sage was Kakashi getting him and Sakura his request for investigation approved. 

  
  


What he doesn’t expect is to find his library at home turned into some sort of conspiracy board. Sakura has taken to studying in the smaller room, so it was only obvious that her investigation notes were going to find their way there, but Kakashi never expected every surface available to be hidden under piles and piles of old parchment paper and record files. It makes it a little harder to drink tea with Yamato by the window, but they manage to do it without interrupting Sai’s and Sakura’s search for truth. 

  
  


The ANBU captain starts spending a lot of time in the house, too. Every free moment Sai has from duty, he sneaks into the Hatake compound and into the library through the window Sakura conveniently  _ always _ forgets to close. He sits cross legged while reading through reports, birth certificates of lost children, and anything they could get their hands on pertraining Danzo’s dealings with the Foundation. On nights when their investigation runs out of their hands (almost every single one), Kakashi makes sure that both Sai and Sakura get their rest. 

  
  


“Doesn’t it worry you a little?” Yamato asks him one Sunday morning over coffee, when the kids are still dead asleep in Sakura’s room and they don’t look like they’re waking up anytime soon. 

  
  


“Obsessive behavior from Sakura is not news to me, Tenzo,” Kakashi answers. “And you know Sai is very curious--it only makes sense he’s even more so about this particular topic.” 

  
  


His partner looks conflicted across the table, sipping at his coffee absentmindedly before saying, “What if they find something that hurts him? Worse yet, what if they don’t find anything?” 

  
  


Kakashi thinks about this for a moment. If he was being honest with himself, it was one of his initial worries when he first brought the topic up with Tsunade, because she had pointed out how reduced information on Danzo’s secret organization really was. He knew that Sai could either unearth something he didn’t want to hear, or come up empty after weeks or months or years of looking for answers. It helped that Sakura was so intent in finding out about his past, because Kakashi knew there was no one better at research than her, but he too feared that they’d end up coming empty handed or broken hearted by the end of this tirade. 

  
  


“I think he’s thought about it,” he answers truthfully. “Sai is--cautious. He probably thought about the consequences of his actions three steps in advance.” 

  
  


Yamato purses his lips, rubbing a thumb over the rim of his cup, “I just don’t want him to feel like his future depends on whether or not he has a last name. He doesn’t have to feel like he’s missing something--we’re his family.” 

  
  


“I know,” Kakashi says, leaning over to grab Tenzo’s unoccupied hand. “And I’m sure he knows this, too. I don’t necessarily know what spurred this on, but I feel like Sai knows what he’s doing.” 

  
  


His partner doesn’t look comforted, but before Kakashi can try at it again, noise comes from Sakura’s bedroom. There’s a drawn out yawn, and a mumble for tea, and Yamato rises from his seat to heat some water for Sakura. 

  
  


// 

  
  


A month after, Pakkun wakes him up in the middle of the night. 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t react viscerally, choosing to allow Yamato more hours of sleep while he slips away from their bedroom quietly and trying not to be noticed. He follows the leader of his pack into the library, where a shadowy figure sits resting their head against the window pane. Sai looks younger where the moonlight hits him, and Kakashi can see the faint scars decorating his upper arms and shoulders. He is reminded of the war, of how he had pushed this boy to the limit of his abilities because the battlefield needed his sealing skills and Kakashi was his commanding officer. He remembers holding all four of them in his arms when he’d gotten them back after, how Sai had stiffened under the touch because he still had no idea what affection meant to him. 

  
  


“You don’t have to stand there,” Sai suddenly speaks, his voice tiny in the expanse of the room. “This is your home after all, Kakashi-sensei.” 

  
  


Kakashi shuffles his way towards the window, dancing around the piles of papers that have steadily grown smaller during this last month of investigation. He sits in the chair behind Sai, tucking one of his legs under his body. 

  
  


“What are you doing up?” 

  
  


Sai sighs, shoulder slumped forward in an uncharacteristic show of uneasiness, “I’m just thinking.” 

  
  


“Do you want to share?” Kakashi asks next, but doesn’t press further than that. 

  
  


There’s a beat of silence. Pakkun hops on the windowsill next to Sai and cuddles up to him, settling his head on his thigh and huffing out once. The ANBU captain pets him absentmindedly, scratching behind his ears like Pakkun likes it, and Kakashi wonders when he let all these people so close into his life. 

  
  


“I’m thankful for Sakura’s help,” Sai says. “She’s a bright shinobi. I reckon she would’ve been great in the intelligence division.”

“That she would’ve been,” Kakashi agrees. “It was more prominent when she was younger, but I’m glad she found Tsunade. She shines the most when she’s around people. Besides, her pink hair would’ve been disastrous on undercover missions.” 

  
  


Sai huffs out a little laugh, shaking his head, “She’s refused any wig given to her in any shape or form. She says she finds them derisive.” 

  
  


Kakashi chuckles, “Sounds just like her.” 

  
  


They both fall quiet again after that. The crickets chirp their melodies outside, accompanied by the softer sound of the wind whistling complementary tunes through small spaces. Sai doesn’t once turn to look at Kakashi. 

  
  


“I don’t know if I want to find out after all,” Sai says after a while, voice small. “Sakura’s been very helpful and I don’t want her work to go all to waste, but the closer we get I feel I want to know less.” 

  
  


“There’s nothing wrong with that, Sai,” Kakashi says, reaching out to touch a soft hand against his student’s back. “If you want to stop the investigation now, I promise Sakura would understand your decision.” 

  
  


Sai hums low in his chest, before saying, “I thought it would make me feel better to have a past.” 

  
  


Kakashi doesn’t answer, although he thinks he knows where this is going. Nevertheless, he sits and waits for Sai to speak again. 

“But none of this has made me feel any better,” the boy says, venom dripping into his voice thickly. “I’m still different from the rest. Ino and Sakura try to tell me it’s alright, but everything is so  _ difficult  _ with my peers.” 

  
  


“Sai, that’s only natural,” Kakashi tells him, even if his student isn’t looking at him. “It took me a while to get used to life out of ANBU as well, and I wasn’t a ROOT operative like you were. There’s no shame in what’s happening to you.” 

  
  


“Sometimes I don’t feel human, Kakashi-sensei,” Sai continues on as if Kakashi hadn’t said anything. The Rokudaime wonders if the boy is even listening to him. “I know I’ve come a long way from who I used to be under Danzo, but looking at everyone else, it’s very clear that I’m miles behind people my age.” 

  
  


“Sai,” Kakashi begins, getting up from his chair to sit on the spot left in the windowsill next to his student. “You don’t need to be like people your age. Everyone develops at very different paces and we’re all products of our environment. You were in ROOT for your entire life--it’s normal that you find it hard to get used to normal shinobi life.” 

  
  


Sai turns to look at him for the first time that night, his eyes sad, “It’s like I don’t fit in this world.” 

  
  


Kakashi would like to hug the boy, but he still doesn’t know his boundaries with this particular student of his. Figuring there’s no better moment than the present to figure it out, the Rokudaime places what he hopes is a comforting hand on the boy’s upper back. When Sai leans into the touch, Kakashi takes the opportunity and slides his hand until it’s placed on the ANBU captain’s opposite shoulder. Team 7’s leader doesn’t pull Sai under his arm, but he leaves the option open just in case he’d like to take it. It’s a little awkward, but it’s a compromise.

  
  


“Sai, have you ever noticed that Naruto sometimes uses certain words incorrectly?” Kakashi asks, turning to look at the moon. “Or how Sakura asks about the inner workings of shinobi politics more often than the rest of your classmates?” 

  
  


The boy hums his assent, so Kakashi continues. 

  
  


“That’s because, despite how smart or powerful they have become over the years, Naruto and Sakura still have ways to go themselves,” he explains. “Naruto has trouble with his vocabulary at times because growing up he didn’t have anyone to teach him to read, which is why Sakura will usually help him go through mission reports. And Sakura struggles with the most obscure of shinobi politics because she was raised in a civilian household, so Ino and the rest of your friends have to explain things that they knew of while growing up but that she’s only hearing about.” 

  
  


“I don’t see where this argument is going, sensei,” Sai looks up at him, pouting slightly. 

  
  


“Well,” Kakashi smiles under his mask. “Do you think Naruto and Sakura are any less human because of those gaps in their knowledge?” 

  
  


Sai’s brows meet in the middle, and he says, “That has nothing to do with my problem, Kakashi-sensei. Naruto and Sakura struggle with learned behaviors.” 

  
  


“Social interaction is also a learned behavior, Sai,” Kakashi smiles softly at him. “It’s not something people are born with. You’re just learning it a little later in your life than most others--just how Sakura has to ask about shinobi culture and Naruto learned the word ‘subsequent’ the other day from Sasuke’s last report.” 

  
  


The sealing master looks conflicted for a second, turning away from Kakashi to stare at his bare feet dangling on the outside of the house, just above a bed of flowers Sakura had grown there earlier that week after having trampled over Yamato’s gardenias by accident. 

  
  


“I hadn’t thought about it that way,” Sai mumbles. “I don’t think Sakura and Naruto are less human.” 

  
  


“Then treat yourself with the same kindness you treat your friends,” Kakashi insists, squeezing the boy’s shoulder for a moment. “Are you not kind to Sasuke now that he’s part of your squad? He is struggling with social interactions, too, you said so yourself.” 

  
  


Sai bites the inside of his cheek, and then says, “I guess humans like to see their own faults and not those of the ones around him.” 

  
  


Kakashi smiles, nodding, and tries not to tense in surprise when his student leans into his body, his head finding the spot between Kakashi’s shoulder and neck to rest. For a few seconds, the Rokudaime Hokage allows Sai to get comfortable in his position, and only puts his head down on top of his student’s when he’s certain they’re both comfortable where they are. 

  
  


“If it helps,” Kakashi mumbles after a while. “I think you’re better at it than Sasuke, and he doesn’t even have an excuse.” 

  
  


Sai’s little snort is worth the chill, midnight air curling around Kakashi’s toes. 

  
  


// 

Sai’s room is built almost opposite to Sakura’s at the end of the hall. Yamato makes sure he replicates the big window in the library that Sai seems to love so much, and leaves an easel ready to be used just by its side upon finishing. The ANBU captain insists that he doesn’t need a room in the Hatake compound, seeing as he has his own perfectly good apartment, but all his art stuff suddenly starts popping up in unexpected places around the house. Yamato and Kakashi try to move it all back to the drawers in Sai’s room, and find a beautiful family portrait of Team Kakashi drying in the easel. 

  
  


Kakashi knew Sai was a wonderful artist, the windows in his own home and adjacent greenhouse are proof enough of that, but the Hokage is of the personal opinion that this portrait is the best thing he’s ever seen Sai create. In it, Kakashi and Yamato stand to either side of Sakura, who’s front and center of the team, with Yamato’s hand placed on her left shoulder. Sasuke, who has been growing steadily fast these past few months, stands almost hiding behind Kakashi’s right side, but a small smile has been painted on his face as he looks forward. Naruto hangs on Yamato’s left side, his bright grin almost illuminating the space he was painted into, reaching his new arm behind his teachers to mess with Sasuke’s hair in a perfect display of their relationship. 

  
  


And Sai, crouching a little on Sakura’s right side, placed in the non-existent space between Kakashi and Sasuke. He’s the smallest of the boys, and yet so much taller than Sakura, that it makes his position a little funny. Kakashi wonders if Sai hadn’t added himself there at first, judging by the awkward position he’s in, and hopes that his last-minute decision to paint his own reflection in there is a sign of growth. 

  
  


“I think you should make a frame for it,” Kakashi whispers across his and Yamato’s bed while his boyfriend reads one of the books Sasuke had recommended to him. “We can hang it above our fake fireplace.” 

  
  


“Shouldn’t we ask him first?” Tenzo shoots back, raising an eyebrow. “Maybe he hasn’t finished.” 

  
  


Kakashi shakes his head. “It’s finished,” he says. “It wouldn’t be signed if it wasn’t--plus, it’s been in the easel almost two weeks with no changes. I think it would be safe to assume that it’s finished.” 

  
  


“I still think we should ask, Kakashi,” Yamato frowns a little. “I don’t want to make him uncomfortable.” 

  
  


“I promise you’ll make him more uncomfortable if you ask him,” the Hokage insists. “And if it does make him uncomfortable that we put it up, I’ll take the fall for you.” 

  
  


Yamato stays silent for a while, looking at Kakashi straight on almost without blinking. He understands now why the kids are so scared of his boyfriend, especially if Tenzo looks at them this way often, but Kakashi doesn’t relent until the ANBU Commander finally sighs. As soon as Yamato relaxes, Kakashi beams up at him with a bright grin, thanking him in a quiet voice when he molds his hands into a beautifully styled wooden frame. It’s a simple design, really, but Kakashi has no doubt that it will go perfectly with Sai’s portrait of them. 

  
  


The Hokage leaps up from the bed, taking the frame his boyfriend has created and hurrying into the hallway. Sakura’s light is still on, so when Kakashi passes by the door and into Sai’s room with Yamato on his heels, she cranes her neck around the doorframe to see what they’re up to. 

  
  


“What are you doing?” she asks in her best innocent voice. 

  
  


“Your father is having a moment,” Tenzo answers back, teasing Kakashi with a smile when the Rokudaime turns over his shoulder. “I’m letting him have it, rather.” 

  
  


Sakura makes a sound of confusion in the back of her throat. As Kakashi tries to figure out how he’s going to make the portrait stay in the frame, he hears her footsteps crossing the hallway into Sai’s room, followed by the creak of the door frame as she leans against it. 

  
  


“He’ll like that,” Sakura mentions happily. “I personally have been nagging him to officially give it to you, but he always gets too nervous. He said he’d wait for you to find it.” 

  
  


Sai has discovered anxiety. Kakashi doesn’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing. Nevertheless, the admission that Sai had originally intended to give this to him and Yamato as a gift makes a certain warmth bloom in his chest, right underneath the steady bit of his heart, and spreading outward until it touches almost every part of his body. The back of his eyes sting with tears, but he schools his expression into neutrality, trying to talk around the lump in his throat. 

  
  


“Can you help me put it up?” 

  
  


If Yamato or Sakura heard the break in his voice, neither of them mention it. 

  
  


// 

  
  


The day Sai finally chooses to move in, Sasuke walks through the front door with a box of Sai’s uniforms and freezes at the door frame almost immediately. The ANBU Captain huffs in annoyance, an expression he had learnt very early on because it was common among the members of Team 7, and pushes past the Uchiha until he can walk inside to leave the box he’s carrying at the dinner table. 

  
  


“We’ll never finish unpacking if Sasuke-kun insists on stopping,” Sai mentions off-handedly, completely ignoring the portrait hanging off the wall that had captured Sasuke’s attention. 

  
  


Naruto comes behind, his joke about Sasuke being slow dying almost comically in his mouth, words lodging themselves in his throat. Kakashi watches this happen from the sidelines, holding a cup of tea Sakura had made before leaving for her shift at the hospital between his hands, and a small smile dances on his lips. Naruto’s eyes fill with tears to the brim, and he drops the box he’s holding unceremoniously on the floor before throwing himself at Sai’s body. 

  
  


Sai whines about it, or at least he tries to, asking Naruto if he’ll replace anything that was broken because of his carelessness, before he starts trailing off at the end. His voice dies eventually, as dark eyes land on the portrait hung in the focal point of the house’s main room. Kakashi has maybe seen Sai cry once, and yet, the teary smile that the boy directs his way twists Kakashi’s heart in a way he didn’t think was possible. 

  
  


_ Thank you _ , Sai says without speaking,  _ thank you for this family.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason why I chose this particular storyline for Sai (wanting to know where he came from) is because one day, a scene of Sakura running to meet Sai by the doors as soon as he came back from a mission telling him she found someone who could be his mother, flashed into my brain and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. I don't know if I'm ever gonna write that specific scene, but I thought Sai would definitely struggle with something like this. He was taught to not feel and to always place the mission first, so when he started actually listening to his feelings, it probably wasn't easy to come to the realization that he was so different from his peers. 
> 
> Before I go on to give you some fun facts, an announcement: you guys have officially caught up to what I had as a headstart. I have already made a good advance on Naruto's chapter for next week, but there is a slight possibility that I might not update next week on schedule. Please be patient! I'm determined to finish this series to the end since it's particularly short and I know what I've planned for each. 
> 
> Some specific world-building items for this chapter: 
> 
> -Sasuke was ultimately placed in Sai's ANBU cell because he couldn't keep a team to save his life. Our Sasuke doesn't know how to behave around people, and Sai knows this first hand. You could say that Sai sees a little bit of himself in Sasuke, even if they come from very different backgrounds. Because of this, Sai is very eager to try and help Sasuke. 
> 
> -Kiba being perceptive af is one of my personal favorite headcanons. You know how your dog knows when you're feeling upset and cuddles with you? Yeah, Kiba ALWAYS knows when someone is feeling sad, or happy, or upset. He's very observational, he just doesn't share his conclusions often. 
> 
> -Sai is honest to a fault. Team 7 hates that about him because the only reason Kakashi ever catches them doing stupid shit is because Sai ALWAYS tells him. He doesn't do it to be a snitch, he's just Like That (TM). 
> 
> -Kakashi literally collects Sai's expressions like a treasure. It's the dad in him. 
> 
> Leave a comment and let me know what you thought about Sai's chapter!


	4. naruto

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Often times, Naruto seemed brighter than the sun itself. He was everyone's hero and everyone's friend, so Kakashi hadn't worried about him. He knew his blonde student was resilient--life had made him that way--but he should've known Naruto needed something, as well. After all, the brighter lights create the biggest shadows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back! Just a little late, this time, so I'm glad that I didn't take two more weeks to update like I had thought. I have not started working on next week's chapter because exams are coming up and there are a lot of things to get done before that week. I'm gonna try to update soon-ish, but for now, please enjoy this one! 
> 
> It's a little shorter than the last three. Naruto's chapter was very difficult, much more difficult than anything, mostly because writing Naruto is probably my weakest spot jsjs Sakura's was difficult because she's my comfort character, but Naruto's was difficult because I didn't know how to write what I wanted to write for him. I hope the feeling still comes across. 
> 
> Thank you to Lyssa, who this time did beta for this chapter because I didn't forget jsjsjs she's amazing, as usual. The best of friends and best of betas. Thank you for all your hard work. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who commented last chapter! Your reviews make me so happy and sometimes I go back to read them just to motivate myself to write a little more. You guys have been so kind and loving, you even brought this fic to a 100 kudos under a month, which is SO CRAZY to me because my fics only reach 100 kudos over a year of being posted. Thank you for all the support and for enjoying my fic!

Naruto doesn’t show up at Kakashi’s house without being explicitly asked. 

  
  


It strikes Kakashi as very odd that Naruto has suddenly learned about boundaries, and although a year or two ago he would’ve called himself crazy, right now he’s begun to resent the fact that Naruto is not always around. Sure, Uzumaki visits his office enough times a day to ask his questions about the village and politics, and Kakashi shouldn’t miss him the way he does, but there’s something about the formality with which Naruto approaches the Hatake compound every time they meet for dinner there that rubs Kakashi the wrong way. 

  
  


He mentions it to Yamato one night, as they’re both getting ready to go to bed. Sakura and Sai had been fighting earlier about the whereabouts of a shirt that turned into the whereabouts of a paintbrush, but they eventually settled down after Yamato gave them both a stern look. With the quiet that now reigns in their home, Kakashi takes a shot at mentioning his troubles to his boyfriend. 

  
  


“Isn’t it weird that Naruto doesn’t come around unannounced anymore?” 

  
  


Yamato laughs a little, shaking his head as he pulls on his night-shirt, “I do believe most people would be thrilled about their personal quarters being respected.” 

  
  


“No, listen,” Kakashi tries again, pushing himself to rest on his elbows to look at Yamato more straight-on. “We both know what Naruto is like. It’s weird, isn’t it?” 

  
  


“While I think you’re weird for thinking about it that way,” Tenzo begins, turning on his heels to stare at his boyfriend. “I do agree that I’ve thought about it, too. Have you noticed that he doesn’t stay too late whenever he’s around?” 

  
  


Kakashi beams, “Yes!” he says. “It’s so strange! It’s like he doesn’t want to stay. Are we bad hosts?” 

  
  


Yamato shakes his head, “I think it’s something different. It may not even have anything to do with us.” 

  
  


“Do you have any ideas?” 

  
  


His boyfriend shrugs a little, sitting at the edge of the bed, “I have some theories about how he must be feeling.” 

  
  


Kakashi stretches his arms until he can wrap them around Yamato’s waist, shuffling closer so he can press his nose against his boyfriend’s thigh, “Share with me?” 

  
  


“No,” Tenzo chuckles. “I don’t know if I’m right and I don’t want you to be biased. You should talk to him yourself, I think.” 

  
  


Kakashi groans dramatically, rolling to one side, “I hate you.” 

  
  


Yamato laughs, shoving Kakashi playfully as he stands up, “Stop being so dramatic,” he says. “I’m gonna go check on Sai and Sakura--make sure they make nice with each other.” 

  
  


“That’s why you’re the nice parent,” Kakashi shoots off-handed, but doesn’t miss the way Yamato’s whole face brightens. 

  
  


// 

  
  


The next day, Kakashi waits for Naruto to roll into his office to start his interrogation. 

  
  


The blonde Uzumaki bounds inside with his usual brightness, but the person he drags along behind him is different today. Hinata, probably one of two people that still respect him among her peers, ducks her head hastily into a quick bow as she crosses the door, moved forward by the sheer force of Naruto’s excitement. Kakashi blinks owlishly at the pair, as Naruto pulls his usual chair closer to the desk, launching himself into his usual flurry of questions without reprieve. Hinata follows his lead and pulls a chair of her own to sit by Naruto’s side. He’s heard Sakura’s gossip about them spending more time together, but seeing it himself is strange. 

  
  


“Hello, Hinata,” Kakashi interrupts Naruto’s rant, choosing instead to focus on the Hyuuga in front of him. “It’s nice to see you--you haven’t been in my office for a while.” 

  
  


Hinata gifts him a pleasant smile as she answers, “Yes, Kakashi-sama, I took a small leave to help around the Hyuuga compound. My father decided to make some big changes--finally.” 

  
  


“I have heard, of course,” he answers. “And please, Kakashi-sensei is still fine. Kakashi-sama makes me feel old.” 

  
  


“You  _ are _ old, Kakashi-sensei!” 

  
  


Naruto still seems to be the same Naruto, he thinks, but even Naruto must have some bad days. Kakashi wonders if he’s worrying too much, needlessly, but he knows what war does to kids like his own. It happened to him, and it happened to so many of his friends--he had already seen the traces of the war in Sakura, some of it in Sai and Yamato, too. Even when Naruto seemed larger than life, brighter than the sun, Kakashi couldn’t help but worry about him. 

  
  


He’d wait for Naruto to get all his questions out, and then he’d get answers. 

  
  


// 

  
  


“Hinata,” Kakashi calls to her, just before she closes the door behind her. “Would you mind staying around a little? I want to send something to your father.” 

  
  


“Oh, of course, Kakashi-sensei,” Hinata answers, turning on her heels.

  
  


“Why didn’t you tell us that earlier, sensei?” Naruto whines, walking back into the office with his arms behind his back in pure Naruto fashion.

  
  


“Cause it’s none of  _ your _ concern, Naruto,” Kakashi acts nonchalant. “It’s sensitive information for the Hyuuga clan--would you mind waiting for Hinata outside?” 

  
  


He groans, but Naruto doesn’t fight it. It’s a sign of how much he’s grown and how much he respects Hinata as an individual that he’s chosen to walk out of the room himself. He tells the girl that he’ll wait for her downstairs to walk her home. Just to prove to Kakashi that he can, Naruto sticks his tongue out at him just before closing the door. 

  
  


“Sit again, Hinata,” Kakashi asks. “Sorry I had to keep you here under false pretenses--I hope you don’t think ill of me because of that.” 

  
  


Surprisingly, Hinata simply smiles as she sits back down on the chair she had been using, crossing her hands on her lap in front of her. 

  
  


“I was hoping we could talk, too,” she says. “You seemed to have a lot on your mind today, too. I wondered if we were thinking the same.” 

  
  


Kakashi is intrigued, so he nods for her to continue talking. 

  
  


“Well, it’s about Naruto-kun,” she says, her eyes downcast despite the rest of her posture being completely straight. “I think he’s been a little down lately--I don’t know if that’s what was on your mind as well?” 

  
  


“By the Sage,” Kakashi sighs, leaning back in his chair and pressing the palms of his hands into his eyes. “I’m so glad someone else has noticed.” 

  
  


Hinata smiles a little, then, “I also agree--he’s very good at hiding his true feelings, I think.” 

  
  


“Please, Hinata,” the Hokage says, letting his hands hang down at his sides to stare at his subordinate pitifully. “Lend me your knowledge.” 

  
  


The Hyuuga simply hides a little laugh behind her hand before she starts explaining what she’s seen. 

  
  


// 

“Hinata thinks Naruto feels lonely,” Kakashi blurts out one night while Sakura is setting the table so they can eat. “Do you guys think he’s lonely?” 

  
  


Almost all activity ceases in the kitchen. Sakura stops mid-way through setting Sai’s plate in front of him, green eyes focused almost too intently on the little tea blemish that’s permanently stained into the tablecloth since last Saturday when Sasuke spilled his tea there. Yamato’s entire frame freezes where he is by the stove, shoulders tense as he was caught between serving the next plate and the obviously uncomfortable question. Sai seems to be the only one not keeping up, looking between Sakura and his hovering plate in her hands with furrowed eyebrows meeting in the middle. 

  
  


“Sakura,” Kakashi chooses his student first, knowing she has a knack for gossiping. “Want to tell me something?” 

  
  


“Now, sensei,” Sakura recovers fairly quickly, setting Sai’s plate down and turning around to grab the next one Yamato is already holding out to her. “Is it really fair to ask me something like this?” 

  
  


“So he’s talked to you.” 

  
  


Kakashi hears more than sees the grimace Sakura makes, “He didn’t necessarily talk to  _ me _ .” 

  
  


“Sakura.” 

  
  


It’s a warning, one he hasn’t had to give her since that time she knocked her peers unconscious in her quest to kill Sasuke, and it’s ridiculous how much effect it has on her the moment it leaves his lips. Her whole body deflates, like she’s been caught doing something she definitely shouldn’t be doing, and while she usually wouldn’t mind bending and breaking his rules a little for the sake of herself and her friends, she seems adamant when she turns on her heels to speak. 

  
  


“I may have overheard a conversation he had,” she says through gritted teeth, looking at her feet like they’re the most interesting thing in the world. “With himself. In his home.” 

  
  


“I believe that’s called eavesdropping.” 

  
  


Sakura snaps her eyes to Sai in record time, looking like she’s about to growl at her teammate and pounce at him to keep him silent. Yamato thankfully breaks through the moment, walking past his student and herding her towards her seat with a stern hand on her back. Kakashi wonders when they’ve all gone so domestic, but finds he doesn’t really mind. When Sakura sits down finally, she turns her eyes to look up at Yamato, shiny and bright like she wants him to save her from Kakashi’s disappointment. 

  
  


And he would be really disappointed--if this didn’t work out in his favor. 

  
  


Faking his best disappointed teacher look and voice, Kakashi turns his grey eyes towards who he considers as his eldest child--Sai’s unknown birth year notwithstanding. 

  
  


“So, you were eavesdropping?” 

  
  


Sakura winces, a little pout to her lips, “We were gonna get ramen together!” 

  
  


“And you chose to eavesdrop on him?” 

Again, emerald eyes snap to Sai, “I didn’t mean to! I was waiting for him outside but he never came out so I went up to his door and ended up listening to him--I didn’t tell anybody.” 

  
  


The last phrase comes soft, almost lost in the unbearable silence of their kitchen. Kakashi notices Sakura looking at her own hands, which are curled impossibly tight in her lap. His kids have certainly kept his mind occupied the last couple of months. He wonders for just a second if that’s ever going to change. 

  
  


“What about you, Tenzo?” Kakashi asks, turning his focus somewhere else while Sakura regains his bearings. “What have you been keeping from your Hokage?” 

  
  


“Now,” Yamato begins, brown eyes boring straight into Kakashi’s greys. “I told you what I thought about telling you my theories. If you want to help Naruto, you need to figure it out on your own.” 

  
  


Kakashi has wondered so many times why Tenzo never feels comfortable with approaching the students about their personal troubles in the same way he basically orders him to do. The Rokudaime knows that Yamato loves his children just as fiercely as he himself does, but for some reason, the Mokuton user never seems to ask the hard questions that come with Team 7 growing up. Even with Sai, whom Kakashi thought he’d find more common ground with due to shared experiences, Yamato simply relayed his thoughts to his boyfriend and waited for Kakashi to talk it out. 

  
  


The Rokudaime Hokage was no expert on feelings, so that ruled out any insecurity Tenzo may have had rooted in what he thought were subpar emotional abilities. Kakashi was also of the opinion that Yamato usually was much better with his words than he was, but that didn’t mean his boyfriend felt the same way. He surely hoped Tenzo didn’t feel like he had no place on the team, because the looks he repeatedly gave them all whenever Team 7 was bickering about something didn’t seem like nothing. 

  
  


Ah, Kakashi would talk about that when the issue came up. 

  
  


“He’s always been lonely,” Sakura speaks up again, still looking at her hands. “I think so, at least. I remember him saying how, sometimes that feeling disappears into the background--like white noise on the radio--but that he’s never forgotten loneliness. I’ve been thinking a lot about it. About how to bring it up to him. It never seems like a good time, and I don’t like overstepping my boundaries after everything that has happened. I haven’t--I haven’t been a good friend to him.” 

  
  


Sai looks pensive before he speaks, “Naruto has repeatedly said you are one of his best friends--I reckon you might be the closest thing he has to a sister.” 

  
  


“Sai…” 

  
  


“No,” he cuts Sakura off before she can even begin, voice stern. “Listen to me, please.” 

  
  


The only indicator that Sakura is willing to do just that is a tiny jerk of a nod. Sai continues. 

  
  


“I was wrong. Back then, before the war,” he begins, shoulders tense. “I didn’t understand you, and I sure didn’t understand Naruto.” 

  
  


A pause. One that lasts far longer than Kakashi would like it to. These conversations were difficult, but he knew his students needed to have them. 

  
  


“You guys had each other. The same way I had my brother Shin, and Shin had me. The same way Yamato-taicho had Kakashi-sensei, and Kakashi-sensei had Yamato-taicho. In the way we had nothing but each other, you and Naruto had lost everything but the faith in the bond you shared. I never pieced that together. But at the end of the war, in the camp, Naruto rushed to  _ you  _ first when you woke up after exhausting yourself from helping the wounded. Nobody else--not even Uchiha Sasuke. That’s when I knew I had been wrong about the bond between you.

  
  


“I wish I had never spoken to you the way I did before the war,” Sai continues, and Kakashi would like a refund from this whole conversation because he wasn’t expecting these many feelings to be involved. “We have all made mistakes, but I think--I think we are given chances to fix them, right?” 

  
  


Sai turns towards Kakashi, eyes so desperate, begging his teacher to have all the answers he doesn’t have himself, “Right?” 

  
  


Kakashi places on his best smile, sharing a look with his boyfriend across the table, and nods once, “Right, Sai.” 

  
  


// 

  
  


The next time Naruto comes into his office (which is, of course, exactly the next day), he is once again pulling Sasuke by the neck of his shirt. Kakashi waits for Naruto to uncurl his hand from it before clearing his throat and waving Sasuke away. 

  
  


“What?” Naruto asks, dumbfounded. 

  
  


“What do you mean by--” he mimics Kakashi’s signal, grimacing. “We’re here for Hokage questions!” 

  
  


“ _ You’re _ here for Hokage questions,” Kakashi says. “Sasuke is here because you love to make him suffer.” 

  
  


“Aa.” 

  
  


Eloquent as always, Sasuke doesn’t waste the opportunity he’s been given and disappears immediately from the office. Naruto, now left alone, looks betrayed and confused in the middle of the Hokage room. With another signal, Yamato appears from behind the desk, ANBU mask hung by his hip, and tension coiling in every chakra point in his body. 

  
  


“I have a proposition,” Kakashi explains, lacing his hands together right in front of his lips--an action reminiscent of an angsty twelve year old Sasuke that Kakashi laughed about so much. “Sit down. Let’s talk.” 

  
  


Naruto’s confusion only grows upon seeing Yamato emerge from the wall in his particularly mysterious way, but he still sits down on the chair that had been drawn closer in preparation for this moment. His movements are maybe more calculated than usual, concerned about what the Hokage and the ANBU Commander will scold him about now, so Kakashi tries to put him at ease. 

  
  


“Calm down,” he tells his student, smiling softly. “You’re not in trouble Naruto.” 

  
  


“I don’t see how I would be, you know?” Naruto answers. “I’ve been diligent! I’ve written all my mission reports myself this week!” 

  
  


Kakashi knows that. Naruto’s handwriting has really gotten better these past few months now that Sakura seems to be helping him out with it. 

  
  


“You have been,” Yamato reassures, although he feels as anxious as Naruto probably is now that Kakashi’s forced him to be an active participant in this conversation. “Don’t worry, we just want to talk about something important.” 

  
  


“Oh.” 

  
  


Kakashi reaches to the drawer on his right, where he’s placed the pair of spare keys he had made the same day he made Sai’s. Without breaking eye contact with his student, who is becoming more and more uncomfortable under the scrutiny, Kakashi grabs the key with the orange keyring and places it on the table. The steel makes a soft sound against the wood, but in the stillness of the room Kakashi hears it like a goddamn thunderstorm. In front of him, Naruto seems too stunned to the point of not breathing. Like a reflex, Yamato’s chakra shoots out from his right to reach their student, soothing away the clear tension in his shoulders. 

  
  


“I have an apartment,” Naruto mumbles, still in a trance. “I don’t--I mean--I shouldn’t…” 

  
  


It sounds to Kakashi like Naruto is trying to convince himself that he doesn’t need to move in with the rest of his team at the Hatake compound rather than actually trying to deny the offer that he’s been given. He wishes, not for the first time, that he was better at giving comfort and having conversations that matter. Kakashi thinks he’s been doing pretty well for himself the past months with Sakura and Sai, but sometimes it’s still so difficult to put into words exactly what’s in his heart. His kids deserve nothing but the best, and it pains him that he cannot give that to them constantly. 

  
  


“Naruto,” it’s Yamato that interrupts, looking pale and a little unsure. “We want you to--if that’s what you want. I think it’s about time you came home to your family, don’t you think?” 

  
  


It’s forward, but it does the trick. Naruto’s eyes finally snap to attention, no longer glazed over with doubts and turmoil. Kakashi smiles at him from under his mask, and nods at his boyfriend’s words like they’re nothing but the absolute truth. 

  
  


“I know for a fact Sakura would appreciate stealing another clan’s shirts,” he jokes, although he knows his student will probably do just that. “Plus, district 4 is so far away from Hokage tower, and I could use a hand around the office.” 

  
  


Naruto is near tears, face scrunched up as he tries to stop himself from letting it all out here in the middle of Hokage tower. Kakashi thinks Naruto must’ve been holding this in for even longer than Hinata was aware of it, and it only serves as a reminder of how terrible a teacher and caretaker he really is for these kids broken by tragedy and war. 

  
  


Naruto makes four, he thinks, four of his loved ones he failed to realize were in pain before and for whom he hadn’t been able to offer any comfort. Kakashi knows that not everything has to be on his shoulders, but Team 7 is  _ his _ responsibility--has been for a long time--and he can’t stop thinking about how blinded he was by his own grief and sadness that he didn’t see any of them were being consumed by their own demons. 

  
  


Even Naruto, who Sai painted into the canvas like he was a shining beacon. Even Naruto, who brought back Sasuke to their sides. Even Naruto, who Sakura smiled for even on her darkest days. Even he had been suffering, and Kakashi had been none the wiser. 

  
  


“I’m sorry,” Kakashi suddenly blurts out, overcome with his own stupid feelings seeing Naruto trying to hold back tears. “I’m sorry I didn’t notice before.” 

  
  


That’s what it takes for the blonde Uzumaki to finally let it all out, blue eyes brimming with tears and spilling over as a sob shakes his body. Yamato’s entire body twitches, like he wants to wrap his arms around Naruto and take all the hurt away, but it’s like the ANBU’s body is nailed down to the floor--like he’s holding himself back from offering comfort. Kakashi stands up from his chair, legs shaking because he feels powerless and overwhelmed, and circles around his desk to reach Naruto before his strength wanes out. For added measure, he makes sure he traces feather-light fingers over Yamato’s lower back, a small comfort that he hopes settles Tenzo’s inner turmoil. 

  
  


As if trying to hide his tears from the outside world, Naruto curls in on himself to cry before his teacher can reach him. Kakashi shakes his head, gently guiding him to stand up even when Naruto’s entire body is wrecked by sobs. Kakashi has half a mind to send a pulse of chakra through the office floor to activate the sound seals surrounding the room, hoping Sasuke hadn’t been waiting outside to hear what was happening. Finally on his feet, Naruto grabs onto Kakashi’s torso, burying his head in the space between the Hokage’s shoulder and neck. The force of his cries shakes Kakashi to his core. 

  
  


“I’m so sorry, Naruto,” he says, because there’s nothing else to say. “None of us noticed. We’re all so sorry we let you hurt like this all this time. You didn’t deserve it.” 

  
  


Naruto cries well into the evening.

  
  


// 

Naruto doesn’t have many possessions. 

  
  


It’s strange, but he has even less than Sai did when he first moved in. Kakashi wonders if this is a direct result of the invasion and the war right after, or if this is what life was for Naruto all these years--counting his personal items in the palm of his hand and only growing attachments to a couple of things that he knew he could keep forever. It’s a sadenning thought that leaves his heart heavier than it has been all week. 

  
  


Naruto’s plants take up most of the space in the boxes that they shunshin all the way to district one. Yamato and Sakura are excited to have more green around, placing the pots in visible places under window sills and corners that need the added life. Sai mentions off-handedly how someone could take beautiful pictures of the way the glass art he’d made refracted on the leaves and petals of Naruto’s plants--a comment Kakashi takes to heart. Sasuke agrees with a quiet voice, almost distracted, tracing the pads of his fingers over the tomato plant that Sakura had brought back from the dead upon induction to the house. 

  
  


They finish unpacking everything in record time--thank the Sage for Yamato’s organization skills--and they lounge in the living room with tea and snacks. Naruto’s room sits in front of the library, on the same side that Sakura’s is, and he shares a bathroom with Sai. The boys complain that Sakura gets her own shower and toilet, to which she retaliates by saying she’s the eldest and has more rights than both of them combined. Sasuke, who had been quiet most of the day except for his passing interactions with Sai and Naruto, comments on how they couldn’t possibly know she’s the oldest because Sai’s birthdate is still very much undisclosed, and she stares at him like he’s suddenly grown a third head. This makes Naruto laugh out loud. 

  
  


Kakashi knows maybe his kids aren’t all that alright, but when Naruto hooks an arm around Sasuke’s neck and messes with his hair, he feels like maybe they’re all on the path to being okay again. 

  
  


All of them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, like I said, Naruto's chapter was so difficult. I hope it wasn't too bad and that you guys still enjoyed it! Here's my fun fact bit, as usual: 
> 
> -I wanted to add Hinata in the same way I added Ino for Sakura. Right now they're only friends and getting to know each other better--Naruto pulls her around the village in the same way he pulls Sasuke to unwanted situations, but at least Hinata is nice about it jsjsj This fic is not tagged as shippy because there's no real romantic scenes, but if you guys think it's necessary please, let me know! 
> 
> -The Sai & Sakura scene was unexpected for me this chapter, but I really liked how it ended up! I think everyone has things they said that they'd like to take back. Sai has learned enough about his teammates now to understand that what he did was emotionally manipulative and very cruel of him. I wanted to address that, even if it was in passing. 
> 
> -Sakura is gossipy. I hope no one takes that as offensive? I don't think there's anything inherently bad in liking to know stuff (maybe because I also am gossipy sometimes haha) and I think that character trait of hers is intrinsincally linked with her innate curiosity. 
> 
> -Naruto would definitely not tell anyone about how he's feeling. He'd think he's being ungrateful and annoying, so he keeps his negative feelings to himself. He was mistaken if he thought he could keep that from his friends and teammates--especially from Sakura Haruno, who we have established knows all. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! I've never plugged in my socials here, but you can find me in tumblr and twitter as @ivyxwrites. I mostly spend my time in twitter nowadays, but I do check tumblr AT LEAST three times a week jsjsjs please don't be afraid to reach out to me if you want to talk to me outside of comments! 
> 
> Sending you all lots of love!


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